The Lima Institution of Mental Health
by PiperSpoon13
Summary: AU, All the glee kids an mental institution, Will is trying to help the kids but some may be too scarred to be helped. Santana has been deeply hurt by her past, Brittany is hearing voices, the others have their problems. Wemma/Brittana Read warnings
1. Chapter 1

**Lima Instutuion of Mental Health**

Summery: AU, All the glee kids an mental institution, each for their own reasons. Will is the new arts teacher and through music helps the kids become more normal and even find some romance for himself.

_AN: This story is very AU, and as cheesy as it sounds it came to me in my sleep...a side effect of my sleeping medications has me sleepwalking, talking, writing, cooking. I woke up the next morning with my psychology book and the cliff notes of this chapter and it has been buging me until I actually wrote the first chapter. That being said I don't have this 'planed' out much. Every time I plan a story I never get it typed and rarely get it finished, so I don't know how updates are going to go. Hope you enjoy and reviews are welcome._

_This is a dark fic that is filled with triggers which is why it's rated M : Here's a list of the big ones: Mental illness, child abuse(including sexual), gay bashing, and eating disorders. It originally rated this T until I got to the point of writing the child abuse and then it got too graphic in my opinion to not wart a M rating. If you are very young or sensitive I suggest you not read this. This story might become more about Brittany and Santana than Will and Emma but I don't know yet.  
><em>

**-Will-**  
>Every since I was little I had loved music. Terri buried that love for almost five years; now she's gone and I can get back to the flow of things. To kick off my new life, I'm going to bring music to the kids who need it most, kids who are often forgotten I'm not talking about the terminally ill or an 'at risk' school, there are plenty of charities for them. I'm going to try to bring music to the teen ward at LIMH(Lima institution of mental health). It was more of a halfway house. They went to the school on the propriety and they were happy to bring in a teacher of the arts.<p>

After going to psychology classes for six months I finally get to meet the kids. I sit in my car looking down at the files I've been given. I open up the one on top after taking a deep breath.

Name: Artie Abrems  
>Age: 16<p>

I closed the file. I'll look at these as needed. I don't want to make any prejudgments because of their problems. I want to go into this like they are normal teenagers. I scan my card at the gate and head to the wreck room we're I was supposed to be meeting one of the guidance counselors. A small clean dressed red-haired woman was sitting on the bench looking at me. "Hello" she said when I got up to the door. "You must be Will Schuester. I'm Emma."

"That's me" I hold out my hand and she looked down at it a nervous look replacing the smile. I put it back to my side. "Are you the person who's supposed to show me around?" The awkward moment passed she nods.

"This is the wreck room where most of the kids hang out, it is also one of the only places that girls and boys are allowed; it's where you'll be meeting the kids too. Speaking of which here are two now." She nods to a Latina girl and a tall blond skipping practically hand in hand toward us.

"Hello Ms. P who's curly top here?" the darker girl asked, quickly dropping the taller ones hand. Her face was flushed briefly before putting up a guarded front, for me who was still an outsider. I smile anyway, continuing my observation of the girls.

"He's going to be the new music teacher, you two signed up right." The blond one nodded enthusiastically."Will Schuster this is Brittany and Santana, you'd rarely see one without the other."

"And your showing him around here?" Santana asked with a slight smirk. Emma nodded trying not to show the younger girl struck a nerve. Though I didn't know what it was. "Talking about the blind leading the blind; Are you crazy too?" she asked looking at me. "Come on Britt-Britt let's go find your cat." then they started running off again before I had a chance to answer.

"What was that about?" I ask Emma just kinda looked down at her feet.

"I'm actually a patient here...but I am a counselor; I studied the same classes as you, I just can't do messes and they don't feel I should live alone just yet. I really wish Santana would stop encouraging Brittany's hallucinations."

"Hallucinations?"

"Her cat, he died 6 years ago. It's one of the main reasons why she's here, but between the two of them they help each other more than telling her her cat has been dead for years would. If I were to correct her she would lock herself in the bathroom crying creating a problem with Santana. She probably would have lashed out at me which would get me dirty which would cause me to have a major relapse, which will end your tour. "  
>"I got it Emma." I smiled, her ranting was kind of cute. "Are they more than just friends?" I wondered looking after them, remembering the seconds of blushing.<p>

"Kinda, they have been roommates since Santana was admitted. When one of the nurses caught them in a compromising position we separated them but they regressed so much without the other, we were forced to put them back together, on the condition that there would be many more checks after 'lights-out', so that is what I call a loaded question. They are more but until they tell you, you should pretend they are just friends. Especially with Santana, you will have to walk on eggshells with her even after she opens up to you."

"So" I started changing the subject, I didn't want to learn to much about the kids until I have gotten to know them.

"What made you think about working here. Wouldn't you rather help the adults?" I pried I knew she'd could fire back with why I didn't teach adults about music or why I didn't want to teach in a more urban area etc.

"I've been here since I was 8, even-though I got help when I was little. It was very clinical. I didn't know my shriek and my shrink didn't know me beyond my OCD and my compulsions. I'm was more than that. My parents only put me here so the neighbors wouldn't see me scrubbing things. I was damaging to them and their all ginger social circle. I don't want these kids to become what they were sent here for, the adults have already become that. There's still hope for them. It's why I'm so happy you've came I signed up to help right away. Music is something so normal to teenagers. Though they had to sign up for it they can express themselves more than their illness."

We continued the tour without meeting any other of the kids. "So I guess I'd be seeing you tomorrow, I know you said you didn't want to have any foreknowledge of the kids and I admire that about you but I really suggest you browse through their files, at least to get an idea of what to expect. I'll hate for some of these kids to start shutting you out. It was really nice meeting you Will." She then put out her hand but still looked nervous. I took it with a smile. "See you tomorrow, then."


	2. Chapter 2

Lima Instruction of Mental Health

Summery: AU, All the glee kids an mental instruction, each for their own reasons. Will is the new arts teacher and through music helps the kids become more normal and even find some romance for himself.

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee.

-Will-

I waited till I got home to read the files. It was one of those things you can't take back. I can't not think of their issues when I meet them, but I can think of all the accidental slips that could jeopardize the entire program. It was enough to convince me. If I didn't know about old scars, I could very well make them bleed. I got out the thick file which had been mailed days before and took a deep breath. I'm only going to skim the first page on each kid. Luckily the first page was a profile of sorts and each kid was bonded by a paperclip.

Artie Abrams was the name on top so I'm guessing they were alphabetical too. He was lucky to be alive after a nearly fatal car accident when he was 8. Despite physical therapy he had only regained felling form the thigh down. After he hit his ceiling, he became bitter and distant. His parents had him committed when he was 14 after a suicide attempt.

Blaine Anderson was committed after his father tried to make him straight by making him work on cars all day. After having no luck, his father then sent him to 'straight camp'. When he came back, he wouldn't come out of his room. His father then sent him to LIMH as one last hope and they excepted as he was a cutter and had seriously low self-esteem after all of his father's failed attempts.

Rachel Berry had the thickest stack out of all of them. From reading the front page she was adopted by a gay couple who was so happy to have her they spoiled her rotten. As she got older she continued to throw tantrums or storm out of the room when she didn't get her way. By the time she was in Jr. high she had built a reputation for getting her way; she thought it was due her. When they said she didn't get to be the student of the week she stormed out of the classroom. They found her in the bathroom trying to cut herself with the tip of a fine point pen. The school then convinced her fathers to get her help before she tries to harm herself again. I did have to smile at her obsession with Broadway and being a Broadway star. No wonder she signed up for glee.

Michael Chang's file was the thinnest and was the only one to just be on one page. He didn't talk and when he did it was about dance. After 14 years of this his parents sent him to the professionals in hopes that he'd learn there's more to life than dancing.

Tina Cohan-Chang was quiet too but more attentive in class. She'd liked dark clothing and when her parents refused to buy her it she cut apart her fathers work socks and were them as gloves. This went on for a few years. She didn't like to participate in class or groups, and once it was time to move on to high school her teachers explained that they can't pass her because of the lack of social maturity and her parents had her committed.

Sam when told he was too chunky as a preteen. Sam went on a diet and exercise regiment. When he got results he became obsessed with his body image and diet. If he can't do his routine or eat the foods he wants, his anxiety raises till he does.

Quinn's parents had high expectations. Her older sisters were perfect in their eyes. When she didn't live up to said expectations she felt extreme guilt, and started cutting. Their denial of their daughters problem only escalated it. When having a school issued physical the teachers got CPS involved. Her parents then reluctantly agreed to admit her to avoid neglect charges.

Finn never had a positive male role-model in his life. All his mothers boyfriends disappointed him. As soon as he got close to one, the guy would run off with some younger 'prettier' girl. One had taken some of her jewelry before leaving. By the time he was a teenager he didn't trust any adult male. Finn put too much pressure on himself to be the only man his mother would ever need, so when he failed a test, got in trouble or anything else a normal young men does. He couldn't just brush it off. The guilt of it all drove him to a deep depression and self loathing. After writing a suicide note that his mom found before he did anything his mom admitted him.

Kurt was outted to his entire class late JR. . high. The bulling of his peers made his self-worth determinate, despite the constant support of his father. His father couldn't understand but loved him unconditionally. His mother who had always embraced his flamboyancy died when he was 10. After a year of constant bulling and changing of schools Kurt couldn't bounce back. Out of pure worry and heartache his dad admitted him for his safety.

Mercedes was and extreme emotional eater. Her brother who was only 2 years older than her, was the 'sick' child ,and took up most of their time. She found comfort in food from the hospitals vending machine. When she was 10 her brother passed after a long battle of leukemia. She continued eating as a form of comfort. Her parents had tried counseling and locking the pantry at night in and effort to get her better but she had only found her comfort outside of the house. As an effort to further help her they committed her when she was 15.

Santana, I took a deep breath knowing this one was going to be rough. When she was 9, she was forced to kill her uncle who had been sexually abusing her since she was five. He often took care of them between 3 and 5 because her parents still had to work. When her sister, Sebina entered kindergarten, he was going start something on her. Santana tried to get him off of her and he hit her briefly knocking her out. When she came to she went to the kitchen and got a butcher knife and repeatedly stabbed him in the back. Through the bruises and a rape kit they confirmed that it was entirely in self defense and no charges were made. After the incident she often got in trouble for fighting and smarting off in school. By freshman year of high school she was very promiscuous and often flirted with older men. Her parents admitted her after one of the girls she beat up pressed charges. Going to LIMH was better than juvieve and after a messy trial she was admitted and would stay with the program until the doctors felt she was stable. She continues to lash out when threatened or someone she cares for is threatened or hurt weather emotionally or physically

Brittany has always been childlike even as she got older. She was usually very happy. She can have a conversation with anyone and anything and often would talk to strangers. She was easily confused and far too trusting so her parents usually kept her in arms lenghth . She had a wild imagination and often would have long discussions with her stuffed animals. She has trouble telling the diference between life and fantasy. When she was 5 her parents got her a cat. She often said he was doing things like stealing from the cookie jar even though the evidence was all over her shirt. When she was 9 her cat got out and must have eaten a poisoned mouse or rat poison. She continued talking to him in her room. Her parents just thought the cat was being antisocial until the cat body started to smell. When they told her her cat was dead she denied it entirely. Even after the burial she continued talking as if the cat was still alive. It was like an imaginary friend. She continued claiming that he was reading her diary, stealing food and smoking. Every time they explained that Lord Tubbintun was in kitty heaven she would get angry saying he was sitting in the vacant chair in the room. She started bringing food to the imaginary cat upstairs. And once again it started to smell from the rotting food. By the time she was 12 she had gotten no better, a therapist suggested they admit her for on going care.

Noah Puckerman, refuses to go by his first name. Started stealing when he was six. Thinks every girl wants him regardless of age, and refers to himself as 'the Puckasourous'.. Has a relationship with his hair and gets very aggressive if someone comes near it with scissors or razors. When he was 10 he graduated from stealing to setting fires and breaking and entering. After getting in trouble with the police one to many times they sent him to LIMH, because sending him to juvie would just teach him new tricks.

I had my work cut out for me. Thirteen kids all of who have different scars and triggers, some probably never will be completely normal. I couldn't sleep either all I could think about was the horrible things that brought these kids to LIMH. I wanted to hug each and everyone of them. What makes me the saddest is, half of the kids would have been OK if their parents tried to help them instead of ignoring them. I wanted to hurt some of these adults that hurt these kids and I didn't even know them yet. Blaine, the poor boy was slowly torchered by his father's attempts to make him straight. Quinn's parents could have said one sentence and she would have been alright "We're proud of you." Santana's uncle…I would have him killed again if I had the chance. I feel so close to these kids before I even see more than their mug shots on the page(Brittany and Rachel were the only ones smiling). It wasn't right that these kids have seen so much before they even hit their twenties. I couldn't wait to meet them.


	3. Chapter 3

Lima Instruction of Mental Health

Summery: AU, All the glee kids an mental instruction, each for their own reasons. Will is the new arts teacher and through music helps the kids become more normal and even find some romance for himself.

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee.

Will -  
>I stood outside the wreck room. I felt like I was about to walk into the lions den most of who were probably will hate me. Rachel when she doesn't get her way. Tina and Mike probably won't talk. Santana and Finn just because I m a guy. I sighed, hoping my sheet of ice-breakers will lead the way.<p>

"You ready" Emma asked behind me. I must have looked nervous because she added, "It s OK, most of them don t bite."

"That's not funny." I said trying to keep a straight face.

"Your right, I m sorry"

"But do they?"

"Only one has bitten since they been here, that I know of."

"Santana?"

"You read up on them." She said with a smile. "Yeah when one on staff tried to calm her down, she bit him. I think it may have been an act of fear, she doesn't like to be touched especially when caught off guard."

We walk in and I see a large room with a small kitchen with a opened window toward the room. In one corner was a air-hockey table, a fooseball table and a folded ping-pong table pushed against the wall. Adjacent to the game area was a semi-circle of chairs around a medium sized TV. In the middle of the room was two long lunch tables. There were two security guards at the entrance and emergency exit. Also two nurses sitting in the kitchen area. They didn't look too busy but observant none the less.

All of the kids I researched less than 24 hours were all in little groups talking. There was talent everywhere. Well Tina and Artie was watching Mike dance really well while Artie provided a vocal beat. Puck, Blaine, Finn and Sam were at the foosball table, which Sam was dancing around while Finn was bragging in a singsong voice. Santana was standing behind Brittany, by the TV, braiding her hair, some braids where very thin and some were thicker, some hair was purposely kept down. The braids were pulled in to elegant loops and drapes. Brittany was humming something and trying not to fidget. Also in the TV circle, Rachel and Quinn were arguing about which Broadway show was better Funny Girl was Rachel and Chicago was Quinn's. Kurt and Mercedes were discussing fashion at the lunch tables. Brittany was the first to notice me. She looked my direction, "Oh look, it s Curly top." She hopped up while Santana was in mid-braid and ran over to hug me. I wrap my arms around her; not knowing what to say. "You didn't by chance see my cat out there did you?"

By now Santana had made her way over to her and was sending me very strong warnings. "No. Why?' was all I say. I didn t want to start off on the wrong foot with anyone.

"Lord Tubbingtun likes to follow me to class, even when I tell him not to. He's either being a good kitty and staying in our room or he's hopped the fence to the adult ward to get his cigars. If you see him tell him he's in big trouble." I just nod. I then grabbed two folding chairs, arranging them to form a full circle of fifteen chairs. "Alright anyone who joined the Fine Arts class come sit around in the circle" As they gathered I took a long look at the ice breaker sheet. "Alright I m going to assume you all know each other but I don't know you beyond the summaries in your file. I want you to state your name, something you like to do or something you or would like to do, and one thing you love about yourself." Since Rachel looked the most eager I chose her to go first.

"I am Rachel Berry, I like to sing and I would like to be on Broadway someday. I see Quinn and Santana roll their eyes. I love that I have two loving and supportive dads...not that I m trying to make any of you feel bad." she added guiltily.

"I nodded to Quinn. I'm Quinn Fabray, I don't know what I like to do anymore, I'm just glad I 'm away from my parents." I notice Rachel reaching over to squeeze her hand.

"That's ok, it is one of the reasons why I want to help you guys so much. I want to help you find yourselves" I said smiling over at Quinn and receiving a weak one. Emma gave me a 100 watt one and I felt my cheeks flush. Remembering that I was surrounded by teenagers. I moved on to Blaine.

"I am Blaine Anderson, I also love to sing and I love my adorable boyfriend." I see Kurt turn the brightest shade of pink I seen on a boy who was blushing. "I love the fact that I can be out and proud here. It s just sad I had to come here to be accepted."

"I'm Kurt Hummel, I love fashion, I like to sing and I love my dad who even though he is as straight as a guy can get, he loves me and everything about me...I also love my handsome boyfriend"

The rest of the circle didn't really tell me more than what I already knew. Finn liked to play the drums. Puck could play guitar. Santana claimed she only joined because Brittany did. Sam also liked the guitar. This icebreaker didn't help too much. I let them pick a song to sing some sang harmony some sang the melody some provided instruments. They were good I was just going to have to wait till they came to me, and be an ear for them.

AN sorry this took so long. I kept getting ideas for later chapters and knew I needed filler to get to them. I m going to try to post a pov from each POV expanding their back stories. Somehow half my quotation marks disappeared I just added them back in might have missed a few though


	4. Blaine

Lima Instruction of Mental Health

Summery: AU, All the glee kids an mental instruction, each for their own reasons. Will is the new arts teacher and through music helps the kids become more normal and even find some romance for himself.

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee.

_AN: Alrighty I tried to resist but all these ideas started flooding my brain and there was no way I could do it from Will. So here s Blaine's back story._

Blaine Anderson

I'm not as crazy as people think I am. All I wanted as a kid was for my dad to love me. Sure I sometimes dressed up in my sisters clothing and played with her barbies. but I also played with Hot Wheels. My earliest memory of my dad trying to change me was when I was about five. I was playing dress up with my sisters costume dresses. He went to ask me if I wanted to go to dinner and then his shop, he found me.

"What the hell are you doing in that getup. You. are. a. boy. Boys don t play dress up. Now take that thing off and go put on your jeans a shirt and tennis shoes. I m taking you to the shop." My dad ran an auto-shop. I didn't know why he was mad at me but I spent the rest of the day handing him screwdrivers and wrenches. My mother was long gone ran off with another guy when I was 3 and we never heard from her again.

As I got older, I started to realize that I was different. I couldn't bring my self to swoon over 'hot' girls but I found my self drooling with my sister at Justin Timberlake and Leonardo Decaprio. I often asked her why my dad hated me for liking guys and dressing up but when she did it, it was cute. She couldn't give me an answer better than 'Because he's a stupid jerk. Most boys are _supposed_ to like girls. You are different but I love that about you; Dad s just too narrow-minded to realize just how fabulous you are." My sister was only 1 year older than me. She stuck up for me many times. To this day she is the only one that visits me regularly.

For all of my childhood I was forced to work at the 'Anderson Auto'. I graduated to doing pretty much all the basic stuff(rotating tires, changing oils, replacing: headlights, window wipers, radios etc). I didn't fight it; sometimes I even liked it. I liked throwing a tarp over the elephant in the room and pretending that my dad was doing this just to bond with me and not make me straight. When I was 14, I got my first boyfriend; his name was Nathan. My dad thought we were just friends, in fact he was happy that I had a guy friend. We were talking cars while playing Goldeneye on N64. He shoved me because I got him. I playfully shoved him back, so started the shoving war. I wrapped my arms around him, holding him close loving the fuzzy feelings I got. We stared at each other for awhile before we leaned in for a kiss. It was magical. Starting small grazing kisses on the sides of the mouth. Then we kissed fully on the mouth and just when it was about to turn French, my dad started yelling, "Nathan! Go home." he gave me a sorry look before looking at my dad's beat red face and running out the door. That was the last time I ever saw him. I would have ran after him if I knew what was going to happen next.

My dad waited till he heard the door open and close before pinning me against my bedroom wall. "Dad what did I do!" I half whimpered half yelled.

"You were kissing him!" He shouted.

"So, Bridget can kiss many guys but I m not aloud to kiss one! I see clearly who your favorite is." I spat angry that my father had to ruin the best moment of my life.

"Bridget is a girl! Girls are supposed to kiss boys. Boys kissing boys is an abomination." He then let me down. I'm sorry son. I'm going to get you some help. I'm going to send you somewhere to be cured. I didn't realize I was crying until he left. I sat down on my bed, I didn't want to be cured.

I heard yelling downstairs. "Dad please don t do this to him!" My sister yells.

"I'm trying to fix him Bridge."

"He doesn't need to fixed, you need to fix you fucked up views on love."

"Don t talk that way to me; I m your...don t walk way from me when I m talking to you either." I then hear a knock on my door.

'Hey Bub can I come in?" I open the door for her and shut it again.

"Thanks for everything Bridge."

"Don't thank me yet, I don t think he s going to budge on this."

"At least you tried." I then burrow my head into her shoulder and cried for at least an hour. She just held me and whispered confronting 'you'll get through this , and I love yous.'

By the end of the week, my bags were packed and I was sent to a straight camp for two weeks. They told me that they'd teach me to control my feelings for boys. They told me that it was a sin for a boy to kiss another boy. By the end of the first day I started tuning them out. By the end of the first week I went on a hunger strike which lasted 3 days. I refused to talk to these nut jobs.

Yet somehow it scared me. When I found myself thinking about a boy I'd cut myself with my nails. When I got home I wouldn't come out of my room. My sister would bring me food and try to get me to talk.

After awhile my father came in without warning and took me by the hand practically dragging me to the hospital. I found out later my sister told him in order to get me out of the self-loathing she knew our father would never except that I m gay and thought I d actually kill myself trying to convince him. She told me the people here will accept me no matter what and that is what I needed.

Then I met Kurt. I feel a smile and fuzzy feelings surface just by thinking about him. He wasn't my roommate that was Sam but Kurt was amazing. Loved himself and all that made him him. We connected almost instantly. My sister is the only one that visits me. I still hope to see my dad again but know it will only be heartache. I'm not crazy, I just like it here. I don t plan on leaving until Kurt does or until I become of age.

-  
>AN: Not sure who I m going to do next I have snib-bits for just about everyone some will be combined if I cant feel full chapter.<p> 


	5. Santana

**Lima Instruction of Mental Health**

Summery: AU, All the glee kids an mental instruction, each for their own reasons. Will is the new arts teacher and through music helps the kids become more normal and even find some romance for himself.

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee.

**WARNING: This chapter is a VERY strong M. It involves several different forms of graphic child abuse and strong language. This isn't intended for the tender hearted or people under 16. I have warned you**

Santana

I wasn't always the hateful bitch I make myself out to be. I was once as innocent as Brittany. Not anymore, I have been called Satin, bitch, whore, slut and those are only the English ones. What's sad is I was called all of those names before I was 10, it bothers me more than I will let anybody know. I guess my loss of innocents is why I'm so protective of Brittany. Some how she had kept all the innocents of a child; I let him take it from my sister like hell I'm going to let anyone take it from her. I feel so much guilt for my sister.

People say I'm enabling her by not telling her about Tubbs. I'm not telling her to not take her medicine, I make her take it even at times she didn't want to. The medicine was helping, few people remember everything else she came in believing has gone away after no longer thought there were monsters hiding under her bed, that a cricket read her story books. That her stuffed animals throw parties while she isn't there. That her ducky night light was a magic duck that granted wishes. That Santa could do anything. I could go on forever, she is so much better her hallucinations/imagination has matured and died out on it's own and I feel that Lord Tubbingtun will go away too

The therapist thinks I repressed the earliest memories of the abuse. Maybe I do repress some but I remember the first time he went all the way and why I never told, he said he'd hurt Sebina if I did, he said that I deserved every bit of what he was doing, that it was happening because I was bad. He was careful when I was real little avoiding leaving any bruises, I'm assuming because my mom still washed my hair. I remember the first time I knew something was wrong about my uncle, not that I knew the extent of the abuse at the time, I just knew it was wrong.

_"Are you excited for your first day of school darling?"_

_"It's not a big deal Mami, it's just like day-care right?"_

_"Pretty much" she said picking up my baby sister's diaper bag and then the Sebina. "But you get to go over to your Uncle Carlos' after because the school can't keep you till five like the daycare did."_

_"Why not? They did before." I ask truly confused._

_"Because your a big girl now and are going to big kid school."_

_"Uncle Carlos is the one with the dog right?" my mom nods. "Sounds good I miss Niko."_

_The rest of the day was your typical first day of kindergarten, made some friends but couldn't remember them if I tried. I drew a picture of my uncle, his dog and me. I liked Uncle Carlos. I only saw him about 5 times before that I could remember. I remember his whiskers tickling me when he blew raspberries on my tummy. I remember riding Niko as if he was a pony. He was a bull massive and very rideable. _

_When it came time for him to pick me up, I was excited to see he brought me some churros. I spent the next hour munching on the sweet cinnamon twists and playing with Niko. Around then Carlos said I needed to take a nap so he brought me to his room took me out of my school clothes and put on the play clothes my mom left with him. I then laid down, I was a little sleepy as my nap time had been around 3 before and now it was right after our 11am lunch. He snuggled real close behind me so that his front side was against my backside and wrapped his arms around me. I didn't feel anything weird or see any red flags. My uncle made me feel safe that and I was five. The safe part didn't last long._

_After a few weeks of this, he asked me to touch him. He made up some sick twisted reason but I was young and unaware of his intention. By winter the 'games' evolved to me actually sucking him. He coated his erection in whipped cream and told me to get it all off. When I refused he broke a cheap vase. "Look what you've done Santana, you just broke my favorite vase because you were running through the house. After I told you not to."_

_"But that's not true." I stuttered out. _

_"Who do you think they'll believe, so are you going to play with me or not." I felt my tears rising in my eyes. "Don't you start crying." he added as he sat down on the little couch at the foot of the bed. I then lowered my head to the creamy mess closed my eyes and thought of an ice cream sundae. He started clawing my scalp and shoved more of himself into my mouth._

_ I fought the tears trying to keep my vision of a happier place and tried to count 10 happy things. 10: My dad carrying me on his shoulders so I can see Santa in the parade, 9: My baby sister calling me Santti for the first time, 8: My mom and I baking mantecados 7: playing with Niko, 6: Cotton Candy, 5: Riding my bike,.4: Skipping rope.. By now he was forcing my head to move. I tried not to whine but my head hurt form all the hair pulling. And the corners of my mouth were splitting. Then I felt something warm and salty in my mouth. "Swallow it, you little whore." he said and plugged my nose so I had no choice."This never happened. You won't tell anyone about this or any thing else that happens in this room. You hear? If you do I'll kill the dog." When he let go I just laid there crying. Niko started licking me trying to comfort me the door was closed before but now wide opened he was free to come in. After about ten minutes of heavy sobbing. I ran to the bathroom and started to puke._

I don't repress as much as I wish I could. I want to forget about what happened in that house. I wish I could forget all that happened to that little girl I once was. I wish I could have told her to tell that her parents would take care of her, that they would believe her.

"Santana? Baby are you alright." Brittany asks crawling into bed beside me wrapping her arms around me. I must have been crying really hard to have woke her up. "It's ok" she said as I buried my head into her shoulder soaking her night shirt in fresh tears.

"What about the nurses?" I mummer.

"Fuck them. We're not doing anything dirty; I'm just comforting you after your nightmare. Something only I can do." I smile at my girlfriend's language, I was rubbing off on her.

About two hours after Brittany crawled in bed with me the nurse came it. Brittany must have thought I was sleeping. "Shhh...please she's had a really bad night, I promise we won't do anything. Please don't make me go back to my own bed. I want her to feel safe." the nurse just nodded and left the room. "I love you B." I mummer snuggling closer to her.

"I love you too babe. Now try to go back to sleep." she said stroking my hair.

_AN: since this chapter was so heavy I couldn't write it all at once. So we might visit Santana's past again. Because I'm going into the the minds of the kids I'm going to change this story to an M rating._


	6. Chapter 6

Summery: AU, All the glee kids an mental instruction, each for their own reasons. Will is the new arts teacher and through music helps the kids become more normal and even find some romance for himself.

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee.

-Will-  
>The week went by pretty quickly. They were a talented group of kids. "So are you scared yet" Emma said walking me to the gate.<p>

"Nah, they're just kids" I said thinking about I fight I had to break up yesterday. Finn, Puck and Blaine I don't know what it was about they were buddies again by the end of the class.

"You did well this week. Most of these kids minds themselves on a normal basis with exception of a few."

"So what are you doing for lunch tomorrow?"

"I can do lunch if that is what your asking but I'm going to be in the office for most of the day"

"On a Saturday?" I ask confused.

"It's the day kids have the most free time if one of them needs to talk I'm available, I'm off on Sundays and Wednesdays, but you can usually find me in there or making house calls if one of the kids refuse to go to class there are about 30 teens here. Including the glee kids. Not including the very unstable wing." She was amazing, she really did love these kids.

"What's considered unstable here" I ask sitting on a bench she followed after pulling out a towel green on one side blue on the other setting it out blue side up.

"That is up to the state. My guess is if they are a threat to themselves or others at any given point. Santana is usually OK if you leave her alone. And if she needs to be calmed down they usually only have to get Brittany. Normally she doesn't lash out physically. Out of the glee kids she is probably the most 'unstable', but with her history I can't really blame her." I nod just knowing the summery of her history it was certainly one of the roughest.

"You really are amazing the way you care for these kids, even with your own problems."

"They told me before I could go home as long as I don't live alone. But I can't go home to my parents the doctors know that, so I pretty much just work and live here and see my doctor once a week."

"Your still amazing." I say with a smile. I then leaned in to kiss her. She looked hesitant but let me. It was simple. She smiled and blushed a little but out of no where she murmured 'got to go' and ran back toward the main building. It was going to be hard courting this girl but as the fates will have it I tend to be attracted pretty but a little crazy girls. Terri was the kind of crazy that made you crazy. Emma was very sweet and caring but had OCD. I'd have to know her longer but I'm still interested, maybe I'll be the one to take her out of here.

* * *

><p>She called me saying she wouldn't be able to make it to lunch that she was booked for most of the weekend. I was disappointed but understood. These kids were her life and they were becoming mine. I took the rest of the weekend to relax though, I touch up on the issues that the kids have by pulling out my books; yes I studied and I passed with flying colors but now I was studying to the individuals, it seemed more tangible. I wanted to be full of enthusiasm Monday, not just for the glee kids.<p>

Monday came soon enough and I drove the 20 minute drive to the campus. I walk into my glee club and know imminently something was wrong. "Where are Santana, Brittany, and Puck" I ask. Almost afraid of the answer.

Rachel answered in Rachel like fashion "Santana's in isolation. Brittany won't come out of their room and Puck's in the hospital"

"Please tell me they aren't related."

"OK I won't tell you"

Emma then pulls me out of the room. "Just practice the song we did Friday" I say exiting the wreck room. "What happened?"  
>"I don't know the nature of it exactly only what Brittany would tell me. Puck apparently hit on her and Santana went ballistic." I know there's more but that was as unbiased as I was going to get with her."<p>

"When did this happen?" I ask walking toward the main building where the hospital wing was. "They won't let me see Puck because I'm a girl and the doctor didn't question him much at least more than who attacked him."

"What about Santana?" I ask more worried about her out of the three of them.

"No one but the doctors have talked to her and that was very limited because she wouldn't let any male touch her." we were outside his the wing now. "Go on I'll wait out here."

I walk in to see half his Mohawk missing and there was thin scratches in the part that was buzzed. His wrist was in a cast and what looked like bite marks on his neck.

"I know I look stupid." he huffed depressingly.

"No, it just looks like she did a real number you. Do you want to tell me your side of things."

He gave a small nod, "I honestly didn't know better. I have always been a flirt, a charmer. A shy no usually just meant they were playing hard to get. We were in the wreck room eating dinner most of the people had already headed back to their rooms. I don't know where Santana was or that she and Brittany were together. I didn't think real hard so I tried a few pick up lines that I had learned. I know I should have stopped at a not interested but I pressed on hugging her from behind teasing saying you know you want a piece of the 'puckasourous' then she came out of no where screaming at me in spanglish, all I could make out was 'Don't touch her' the actual fight is really hazy. I just tried to retrain her until the guards got across the room. When they picked her up off of me her demeter changed she was terrified. Screaming about not leaving me with her and telling the guards not to touch _her_. I don't know why she is here but I was scared for her. I feel really bad, I do so much that my hair isn't the main reason why I feel bad, I know it's not that bad. I'm worried about her though, and no one will tell me anything because of that damn code, and I'll doubt you will either."

I bit my lip, "Ok I will tell you one thing but I hope you learned your lesson." he nodded. "Santana was sexually abused for about five years in her early childhood. That is all I'm going to tell you though and you didn't hear it from me."

"That explains a lot. Especially if she and Brittany are an idem and as hot as that is I'm not going to so much as sit beside them for awhile." I smile a little at his comment, but didn't set it in for too long.

"I get it boys will be boys but you know that..."

"That 'no means no' yeah yeah Mr. Shue. Thank you for hearing me out." I nod in agreement. "Do you think they'll ever forgive me?"

"I can't speak for them but give it time and they'll come around." He nodded and I left the room.

* * *

><p>"So did you find out anything" Emma asked hopping out of the typical waiting room chair.<p>

"Puck being Puck tried to get with Brittany and because she didn't give him a firm 'no' he thought she was playing 'hard to get' and kept trying until Santana came out of the bathroom or putting her tray up he didn't know and attacked him thinking it was more...he feels really bad and is worried about the girls, especially since Santana went from angry to terrified when they pulled her off of him."

"It's a lot clearer now. Brittany kept defending Santana so I didn't get very far before she went on a rant on why she did what she did which both me and you know why."

"How much does the club know."

"I'm not sure some of the guys been to see Puck but didn't say much and the girls have been checking on Brittany but Brittany will only say it wasn't Santana's fault, not wanting to go into everything. You pretty much have a divided club." I sighed this was not the Monday I was hoping for.

* * *

><p><em>AN: The Rachel conversation has been scribbled on a sticky note since before the character chapters. I'm glad I finally got it down before I lost it. Reviews are always appreciated. I'm not sure which I'm leaning more towards Brittana or Wemma because I'm thinking about changing the characters so more people will find it.<em>


	7. Mercedes

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee.

AN: I was going to combine Mercedes, Kurt and Rachels and lable the chapter Divas but I couldn't get in Kurt and Rachels head and this one was almost done already.

=Mercedes=

I never blamed anyone for why I am here. I can't blame my brother even when he was alive. I can't blame my parents they just had to try to save my brother even if it meant not giving me as much attention as I would have liked. I must have been around 4 when they found out my brother was really sick. I remember when they had him in a MRI my dad took me down stairs to the cafitira. He told me I could have whatever I wanted. So being a kid I chose tator tots, ice cream and a bag of M&Ms. As awful as my day had been the food made me feel better.

There was serval days of the same thing. By the time they started Marcus on the Chemotherapy my dad had to go back to work. My mom and I stayed at the Ronald Mcdonald House while my dad commuted to work. Which only intensified my taking confront in food. Many happy meals later and he went into remission and we got to go home. Now that he was better at this time and my brother and I went to school; I still found comfort in cookies and stuff when I was feeling sad.

Then he got sick again. This time around I was old enough to know more of what was going on. Not much as I was only 8 but enough to know that he might not get better. We stayed at the RMH again. My mom and I made my brother all kinds of bandanna's with is favorite cartoons and colors on them. Other than not being able to play as much he was still my brother. Then he took a turn for the worst. I often found my self in the dinning area because watching him sleep was depressing me. Potato chips and candy bars made the hurt go away for a little bit.

I wanted it to be like those 2 years he was better. He never got better though and shortly after his 12th birthday he passed. The funeral was beautiful but it was something was more than just sad. It was saying goodbye to my only brother and the only brother I'll ever have, unless my parents adapt. There was no one to help me get to the next level on Mario. There was no one to walk with me to the bus stop.

I was so lonely, sure I had other friends but no one who was with me almost constantly. I started snacking at every negative feeling I felt, I failed a test I'd go to the vending machine at school and munch throughout the next class. Whatever it was I usually snacked. by the time my parents put a lock on the pantry, we had a 24hour gas station a block away. They had talked to me many times on how food won't feel the place of my brother; that it won't make the pain go away but it did. They sent me to LIMH because they were worried; I don't need to be here but my therapist thought it was the next best action so here I am. I was hungry but I learned after the first week that it was no use.

I look over at my roommate, she was snoring softly curled in a little ball all I could see was the form in the top of her head. Rooming with Rachel wasn't as bad as you would think when you first meet her. She was spoiled but that was why she was here but once you got past her superiority complex she was really nice. We didn't get to pick our roommates but she would be the I'd pick she didn't talk about foods I wanted to eat, if fact she normally had me loose my appetite by talking about her vegan diet and what was in regular food. She was easy to talk to even if we sometimes fought, I wouldn't mind Quinn either but any of the others I don't think I could room with Tina is too quiet so I couldn't talk to her. Brittany talks to everything, and Santana is one angry girl. Tofu, pickled beats, brocoli yep now I can sleep.


	8. Brittany

AN: This is too short for my likeing but here it is.

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee.

-Brittany-

I'm sitting in my room sulking. "It isn't fair that she get put in isolation." I tell Lord Tubingtun who was sitting on her bed patting his tail. "It's not like Puck was completely innocent, but he is being punished enough."

"No he's not, he just got scratched a bit and looses a bit of that ridiculous hair" I press my hands over my ears. "but your girlfriend gets sedated and locked in a padded room. How is that punishment enough". I move the stuffed duck on my bed and put it in the nightstand. 'Your animals are not talking to you.' I tell myself. "You need to eat" this time it was Lord Tubbingtun.

I knew deep down all of this was in my head and it scared me. Whenever Santana gets put in isolation all the voices come back. The other girls have checked up on me but they wanted to know what happened. I couldn't tell them the extent of it with out saying way she reacted the way she did. Only about a spoonful of people knew the extent of all the issues she has. Just like only a few know just how bad I am when I'm alone. Sure every staff member that interacted with us knew why we were here but most of us are remaining here for a reason. If just medcation was enough we wouldn't be here. "Why are you hiding out in here go tell those nurses you need to see her." says a voice that belonged to Santana's stuffed goat (the only stuff animal she brought) from the chair in the corner. Lord Tubbingtun hops off the bed "I'm going next door to talk to my cigar man" he says before walking through the door. "No you should go give that Puck guy a piece of your mind" says the cricket that I haven't seen in over a year. "shut it, shut it, shut it." I press my hands over my ears wanting it to stop. There was a knock on the door and all the voices hushed at once. "It's Quinn can I come in?"

"Sure" I was happy to have anyone to talk to someone real.

"How are you doing" she asked moving the goat to the bed to sit down. I shrugged not knowing how to say that the voices in my head were driving me nuts. "Your hearing them again aren't you?" I nod, Quinn knew the most about them even if she couldn't make them go away like Santana did. "Have you been taking your meds?" I face palm I haven't eaten the food they brought me and there sat my medication. I hid the plate under my bed cause I didn't feel like eating. I forgot all about my medication. "Take them" I pull out the tray and take them with the bottle of water they brought me. "I got the nurse to tell me that they're going to let her out tomorrow."

"How was glee club today?" I ask curious but not wanting all the people asking me about what happened.

"Mr. Shue, noticed you guys weren't there right away and he and Ms. P went to talk to Puckerman, he's really sorry Britt."

"I know, did the nurse say how she is."

"She's annoyed but not aggressive or as scared anymore."

"She had a really bad night Saturday, that's why she was so easily agitated yesterday." I say, "She's always going to be over protective of me, but Puckermans advances with the she had was what made her go so nuts. If it were just one of the two she probably would have just yelled at him."

"Do you want me to stay in here tonight?" she asked. I smile and nod grabing Santana's goat to snuggle while she crawls into her bed. "Ya'll haven't done anything dirty in here since Thursday." They changed the sheets every Thursday.

I giggle and shook my head. "Does Tina know that your staying with me"

"Yeah she was half asleep when I left anyway."

"Quinn?"

"Hmm"

"Thank you for staying with me."

"It's not a problem Britt, Santana has all but demanded me take care of you when she quote 'fucks up' but god help me if I try anything." I smile I could all most hear her now. I snuggle her goat closer only a few people knew It was hers and not mine. Her daddy won it at a carnival before her sister was born, his name was Julio. though he was beat up and had a stain on his tail, it still meant a lot to her. It smelled like her. I now notice Quinn was sleeping and it wasn't very long until I fell asleep too.


	9. Santana II

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee.

WARNING: This chapter is another VERY strong M, simular to chapter 5.

=Santana=

I hate isolation. It's a quiet padded room with a single cot, that only leaves me with my thoughts. I wanted a hug from Brittany or my family but all that I could think of was my bad memories. Memories of him, memories of the many guys I slept with because that was all I thought I was good for. My parents probably would have sent me here sooner if we didn't try so hard to forget, but somehow it was always in the back of my mind. I am the only one out of our group that has killed someone. It scares me. Knowing I'm capable of stabbing someone 15 times. Granted I hated this person and would probably do it again today but this time around I'll cut off his pecker and shove it in his mouth. Or send him to a state prison and let the prisoners kill him. Stabbing him seems too humane for what he did to me and Sebina. The only thing that came good out of it was getting to meet Brittany. I smile thinking about her I hope she was ok I'm hoping she remembers to take her medication. Q had better be looking out for her.

I pull my knees up to my chest trying not to think about it, but I was alone with my thoughts and couldn't not think of him trying not to think about what he had done to us, but it was too late and I was remembering everything that happened in those three years.

_After the whipped cream incident, I kept trying to get out of school. I would sit next to a kid with a bad cough. I would eat things that might make me sick. I would take cold baths anything to get out of school. When I finally got sick, my parents couldn't get off work so I ended up going over to my uncles again. Thankfully he only made me snuggle with him but the moment I was better, it started again. It had gotten to be routine. I had given up fighting him, he was stronger and when I did fight him, it only made it that much worst. _

_When I got to first grade I started washing my own hair, and the abuse went up several levels. When he picked me up he brought me to his room instantly and changed me out of my school clothes, but didn't change me into my play clothes. I was cold. "go over to the bed and lay down." he said as if he was asking me for something as simple as putting my dinner plate in the sink. I was uncomfortable but by this point I was too afraid to say no. About five minutes after I crawl into bed he gets in with me. I feel his chest hair on my naked back and he is rubbing my chest slowly going down to my tummy and then the band of my underwear. Then he slid them off.I didn't know what was going on I just knew I was the more scared than I have ever been. He began rubbing me wear my underwear used to cover with the other and he held my hips in place. I then felt a burning pain. I started struggling and screaming but he was too strong and held me in place and put a sock in my mouth. It hurt really bad it felt like I was tearing from the inside. After awhile of this he just got up got dressed and then demanded me to get dressed. I was so sore. Later that night I notice a bruised stripe right under my belly button wrapping around to my back. I'm wasn't sure what he did but it hurt so much more than him clawing my scalp. _

_This continued until that Friday when he raped me for the first time. I have blocked out a lot of it I remember bleeding for days and hurting so bad. There was deep bruising on the inside of my thighs so bad it hurt to walk. I made up some excuse to be really lazy that weekend because I didn't feel like doing anything. When it happened again, it didn't hurt as bad but he gagged me. He kept saying that it was my fault for being such a bad girl, that I deserved every bit of it, and I remember him leaving me after curled in a ball crying. Now this level was regular. Some days nothing happened other days everything happened. I hated him and I was thinking about telling until "I'll tell you what" he said holding me real close possessively. "You keep you mouth shut and I won't touch Sebina. If anyone even starts to get suspicious I will hurt her like I've hurt you." I close my eyes. I couldn't tell even though they were teaching 'good touch, bad touch' at school I couldn't let him hurt her. He then started kissing my neck and I went to the place I always went when he'd rape me, I went to the fair that my dad rode all the kiddy rides with me, I went to the hospital where I held my sister for the first time, I went to my favorite park, anything to block out what was happening. It still hurt but I was numb to it now to there was no way I was going to let him do this to my sister. _

I was sobbing into my knees when one of the nurses came in. "It's early morning but we are going to go ahead and let you out. You ok." I quickly wipe my face and nod. When I got back to my room I saw that Quinn was sleeping in my bed. It made me smile she was taking care of my Brittany. I walk over to Brittany's side of the room to see her snuggling Julio and snuggle in behind her.

"You're back." she said sleepily. I just snuggle closer to her and enjoyed the first good sleep I have had for 2 days even if I had to be up in 2 hours.


	10. Dating

AN: This is going to be the first chapter I change POVs within the chapter so pay attinian and like always reviews are appreciated

=Will=

Tuesday everything was back to normal. Puck gave a weak smile to Brittany and Santana who weren't paying any attention. Santana had her legs in Brittany's lap while she massage her calfs; they looked tired but that was about it. I did notice that they seemed to be in pairs or trios. Mike and Tina, Puck and Artie, Rachel and Quinn, Mercedes, Kurt and Blaine, Finn and Sam were paired off but wasn't as chummy as the others. After class Sam stopped me, "do you think I'm chubby?"

I was taken back by the question because the kid was in great shape. "I think you're very fit. Why are you asking?" I said looking the kid over.

" I don't know I've been here for a year now and I haven't gotten a girl friend. I guess I just feel like the odd man out in my room because Blaine's always gushing about his adorable boyfriend, Kurt . I actually caught them making out the other day and had to go back to the wreck room because I was so embarrassed then I ended up sleeping in Mike and Kurt's room because they were cuddling and it was supper awkward. I have never asked out a girl before I don't know if I should show off my abbs or what."

I smile, "I'm not the best person to ask for dating advice, I have only dated two girls and that's counting Ms. Pillsbury and we haven't even been on a date yet. The other ended in a messy divorce and a pre-midlife crisis. I would like to help but I have no experience. Do you have anyone in mind?"

"Not really I talked to Puck first but he told me the last time he flirted with a girl he ended up in the hospital wing, so Santana and Brittany are out of the picture. I'm pretty sure Quinn and Rachel are together too but even not they are pretty needy anyway."

"Sam all the girls you meet here are going to be needy in some fashion but they will also be understanding too. I'll see you tomorrow then." I sighed I don't know why I didn't think of hormones and teens when I signed up for this.

"You handled that well." I nearly jumped out of my skin. "Emma! How much did you hear?"

"Enough to know that your interested. I'm into you too even if when you kissed me the other day caught me really off guard." their was an awkward silence before she laced her fingers through mine. "But lets just start here, for now." I smile and nod.

xxxxxxxxxx

-Quinn-

Maybe dating Rachel is a way to spite my parents but I am really starting to like like her. Santana says we already fight like a old married couple. I can't even tell you how it started one day we were arguing and then she kissed me and when I found myself kissing her back, things just evolved.

I'm kinda jealous that Brittany and Santana get to room together and I don't get to room with my girl but the truth is, is that the two of them did terrible without one another. Brittany started talking to trees and had even tried to hop the fence to go after her damn cat. Santana was nearly zombie like when she wasn't lashing out at the nurses . They grounded each other; Brittany kept Santana from curling up in a ball and giving up on the world and the people in it and Santana kept Brittany from creating more voices talking in her head and not taking her meds (because apparently Lord Tubbington tells her not to).

Rachel makes me feel special her dads make me feel special by actually visiting me and not telling me how much of an embarrassment I am. Rachel is high maintenance but I'm happy to take on that challenge if it means being loved truly unconditionally for the first time.

-Finn-

I'm fine being single dating only makes things complicated. It's not that people think I have a Oedipus complex because I don't. I have liked girls and I still like girls but I always say the wrong thing and then they slap me and then we are enemies not friends. Maybe someday but I certainly aren't looking for them here. Not that the girls aren't cute, cause most of them are. It's just that I can barely deal with my issues much less another's and out of the girls I think Tina is the most sane and she and Mike have been together forever, the two silent Asians. Rachel is a chronic narcissist, Quinn and I are both depressed and she's with Rachel anyway. Brittany hears voices and her girlfriend can be set off if you look at her cross-eyed whether she attacks you or runs away crying is left to chance. Mercedes and I are already close buddies and I don't want to jeopardize that and she's not my type.

My roommate is dating some other girl neither are in glee club nor do we hang out much I'm normally hanging out with Puck and Artie, especially if she snuck over to the boy's ward. We mainly just ignore each other. The day Puck was in the hospital wing I helped put Artie to bed because he said when the nurses do it makes him feel like more of an invalid I just make sure he doesn't fall.


	11. Bad Dreams

=Brittany=

I'm laying with Santana's head on my chest, sleeping soundly once again. She's going though a bad week, this is the third night of having constant bad dreams/flashbacks. I don't know why. If it is caused by an anniversary of one of the many awful things that was done to her or if her therapist is stirring up shit. I feel so helpless when all I can do is hold her and wait for it to pass. She is still terrified of this horrible man who's burning in hell, that took so much from her before she even knew what he was taking.

People think I'm stupid because I keep talking to a dead cat, or that I get confused easily, but it's hard not to be confused when 4 different personalities are telling you different things there used to be more. The voice belonging to the cricket or some times something else depending on what's near by is the only one usually violent; he is also the rarest of them only when I'm partially angry does he emerge. The voice belonging to the duck is bitter but not violent usually, she actually reminds me a bit of Santana when she was in a bad mood. The voice of the goat is the 2nd most common and is pretty gentle usually. Lord Tubbington is the only one that appears the same all the time. He's almost like a person in personalities, he has his bad traits, good traits and days that we can't stand each other. When they separated Santana and I for awhile I kind of went off my medication because they all told me to. During that time I had about 8 voices talking to me. some manifesting out of nothing, some into trees, some in to birds and the rock turtle in the courtyard.

I comb my fingers though her hair lightly as she started to twitch again. I lightly shook her when her twitching became whimpering. When I finally snap her back awake she burrows into my chest sobbing heavily. "Oh, Britt-Britt he won't go away he won't leave me alone even in death he haunts me non stop. I have nightmares that logically will never happen but their so intense they terrify me. I have dreams of him hurting you and me not being able to do a damn thing about it but to watch."

I just stroke her hair whispering confronting words. I didn't know how to help her. It was painful for me to know I caused a bit of this. "Baby have you talked to your doctor about these nightmares?"

"Not recently she knows I have them but not just how bad they are. "

I lean down and kiss her. "Then we need to make sure I'm always here to wake you up and tell you that it's ok."

"I love you so much" she said now sitting up and leaning over to kiss me again and again. I tangle my fingers into her hair deepening the kiss. Her hands started to roam up my shirt. I had to stop her before this went any further. This was how the nurses caught us last time. I was comforting her and on thing led to another and then they found us just in our underwear with my hand on her breast and hers in my panties. I just hug her as started crying again. I felt bad and couldn't tell what had caused it. She was talking through heavy sobs and I couldn't understand her. "I'm so tired Britt."

"I know baby, I know." I say rubbing her back just wanting to take away all of her pain. I don't know why someone would scar her this badly. She will never be normal, but she could have been if he never hurt her. I'm glad that I know her; I just wish she didn't have to go through the hell she went through. I wanted to take care of her forever even if it means never getting a full night sleep again. "San, when we get out of here I want to get married"

I get a smile out of her at that, "I hope you would give me a better proposal than that."

"Give me a break it's 3am and I haven't slept. I do want to marry you but we need to get out of here first. I love you darling. Now lets try to get some more sleep." She then snuggled into my shirt and once she was asleep again I started drifting off as well. She didn't wake up again that night . I didn't know how we were going to get out of here. I'm going to have to make sure she doesn't lash out as badly and I'm going to have to remember my medication.

I think the nurses must have given up trying to keep us in the our own beds. Mainly because when they tried to calm her down she ended up waking half the ward screaming and hitting everyone around her. The three times they tried they had to sedate her. Only a select number of people can even get close to her and why I'm the only one that can calm her when she's at her worst. Quinn and Rachel are the only kids that can even hug her without having to fear breaking an arm; Their are a few of the staff that can hold touch her when she's in a normal mood and that's her therapist and Ms. P. both of who know how deep these issues lie. We take care of each other. I can't tell you how many times I've been pulled out of class times to calm her down. It's something that doesn't surprise me any more. At one point I was completely refusing to take my medication because all my friends were going away, then Santana became my roommate, and my imaginary friends became less and less important. She makes sure I don't get lost. One time I was following Lord Tubbington and ended up in the unstable mens ward. She found me and pulled me out of there before I got too traumatized by the things they were saying, of course I had to calm her down once we were back in our room. I was serious about wanting to marry her. I wanted to take care of her forever.


	12. Over the Wall

**AN: I know my updates have been rapid but the lack of reviews are depressing me. I know this is taking a different life of it's own. I can't follow fifteen story lines it's just too much so I'm mainly going to follow Brittana and Wemma, with a side of other characters. I'm trying to write a better summery but I suck at those things. Feel free to suggest any ideas. **

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

=Santana=

When I went to sleep that day I was confident that I wasn't going to have a bad night. I hadn't had a nightmare in 3 days. Who would know it would be one of the worst nights of my life here.

_The day had come when my baby sister was going to school. I wanted to warn her if I yell go to the neighbor's house, but she's a blabber mouth and no one would believe a 8 year old's word to my uncles and then he really would hurt her._

_I managed to keep him happy up in that bedroom while my sister watched cartoons down stairs. He told her he was helping me with my homework. With me being in the 3rd grade that was more enough for the five year old . I was trying extra hard to please him._

_"You know what little slut you have gotten boring, I think I'm going to try another Lopez. You girls are great but sex is all your good for"_

_"Please, I can do better. Tell me what I need to do to keep her safe."_

_"You better start impressing me now babe." he said wrapping his arms around me. I lean in to kiss him. I had learned a few tricks from the pornos he made me watch. I then slowly remove my uniform using my tie seductively pull him towards me. That day I pulled out everything, hating every minute of it but I didn't dare show it._

_But even when I was trying my best I failed. I held him up until January then things got really bad. He was getting rougher, and one day I went limp like I used to my body just gave out on me. "That's it I'm going to go try your sister."_

_"No! Please." I begged draping myself over him. _

_"Get off of me! I'll be back don't bother getting dressed." he said throwing me off, on to the bed before sliding on his boxer shorts and starting to leaving the room. _

_"Don't touch her" I squealed pouncing him with all 70 pounds of my body._

_"You bitch!" He then threw me down hard hitting my head on the dresser._

_When I came to I ran down the stairs not caring that I didn't have any clothes on. I go straight to the kitchen knowing I couldn't fight him off. I start quietly opening the drawers. Looking for the big knifes. I didn't care what happened to me but I wasn't going to let my sister become what I am now. I finally find the knife drawer and pick up a serrated blade serval inches long. I find him pining my baby sister on the couch. Niko died a year ago so he couldn't help. She was struggling. He had taken her tights off and shoved them into her mouth. The room went silent for a while it felt like one of those cheesy slowmo scenes. I ran after him stabbing him once giving him time to get off my sister and come after me. Once I knew I wasn't going to hurt her I continued stabbing him over and over and over. I didn't count I just held the knife with both hands and kept stabbing him not caring that I was getting the sticky red stuff all over me. The next thing I know a paramedic is wrapping a blanket around me and putting me on a stretcher. _

"Santana wake up. Santana!_" _I awake with a jolt. To see Quinn standing over my bed. This was confusing because the clock said it was only 2 in the morning, what was Quinn doing in our room. I then look over at Brittany to find that her bed was empty and unmade.

"Where's Brittany?" I say panic starting to set in sliding on sweatpants.

"I don't know I was going to ask you the same thing. I heard you crying and whimpering from next door and when it didn't calm down I came to check on you"

"Oh my God, We got to find her!" I say running out the door to checking the mirrors to see the incompetent nurse reading a magazine I manage to sneak out without being noticed followed by Quinn. I took a deep breath trying to get in the mind set of my Brittany. Since our wing was low security we got around easily without being seen. I checked the court yard, nothing. I checked all over the teen campus. I couldn't find her. I was starting to get really worried. She didn't. She wouldn't. I knew what I was going to have to do but their was no way I was going to drag Quinn into this. "Quinn go back to bed. We'll see you in the morning." I say hoping she wasn't going to be difficult.

"I'm not letting you wander into the lions den alone." she said simply.

Shit. "Listen Q, you are nearly out of here you don't need to get in trouble now. Go back to bed." She nodded reluctantly.

"You don't have to do this alone if you need any help I'm here." she said before heading back to our wing. I gave a thankful sigh before heading to the 8 foot wall that we shared with the mens ward. Where Lord Tubbington got his cigars apparently. I could sense that she was over there.

I waste no time shimming up the tree jumping on to the utility shed roof onto the wall. I took a deep breath hopping down. I look around before heading to where I found her last time, their wreck room. It was after hours but it still was the most logical place to start. Then I hear it. "Look what I found boys" I swallowed hard, sneaking along the wall to the outdoor light by a picnic table trying to stay in the shadows. Sure enough there were three guys the largest one had Brittany with her arms pinned behind her back and the other over her mouth. "It seems one of the teen girls followed of her imaginary cat over here. We have schizophrenic hottie on our hands" another man said before he said kissing her hard on the lips. I swallowed hard again. I couldn't take on all three of them so I did the best thing I knew how to, make a scene. So I started yelling and screaming the one holding Brittany loosened his grip enough for her to elbow him in the groin and run to me. We took off running knowing the security guards where almost there. They retained all five of us and brought us back to our side.

"What the hell were you two thinking!" the head of security snapped. "Those guys are really bad guys there is an 8 foot high 2foot wide wall between you for a reason. You two could have easily been raped or worse." I flinch at the word but tried to remain cool for Brittany.

"I was just following Lord Tubbington so he would stop smoking." Brittany said with all seriousness. The guard sighed knowing that she truly thought that.

"What about you?" he turned to me.

"I woke up to a nightmare and she was gone. I knew she saw things and heard things I didn't and I was afraid she'd do exactly what happened. I wanted to get her out of there before anything bad happened"

"Ok I understand that you two can't help some of this but try to use some better judgement next time. Now I don't want to do this but it is policy when anyone sneaks out and something happens to be sentenced to isolation for two days. I do not want to see you pull this crap again hallucinations or not. I'm going to go get your doctor and she'll take you from here. With that he left the integration room locking it behind him.

"DON'T YOU EVER SCARE ME LIKE THAT AGAIN." I said angrier than I wanted, I paused and took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, Quinn woke me up and then I saw your bed was empty. Then those guys..." I start to cry feeling bad for yelling at her for something that wasn't exactly her fault, and all the fear from my most recent flashback to those guys and their obvious intentions for my girlfriend who has held me every night last week was catching up to me. I was sad that we would miss glee club for the next 2 days the kids in that club though I didn't trust them I was actually starting to feel like I could trust them in time.

"I'm sorry San. I really am, you just were sleeping so peacefully I didn't want to wake you. They just kept telling me to following him. That you would be fine." She started to cry and I forgave her almost instantly and just held her I was crying now too. I knew all of these voices in her head confused her, and her isolation would make it worst. I was glad I hopped that wall because I would have never forgave myself if that innocents was taken from her.


	13. Isolation

=Will=

Since I got sick with some kind of virus I had to call in yesterday, I was excited to be coming back I had a set of songs that I was sure the kids would love. I got to the wreck room early that morning, to see Emma sitting outside waiting for me. When she didn't meet me with a smile I knew something was wrong. "What happened?"I say with a sigh.

"I just found out details. Four of the girls aren't here. Brittany and Santana are both in isolation and Quinn won't come out of her room. Rachel is staying with Quinn trying to figure out what happened. Quinn knows something but isn't telling or talking much at all. I talked to their therapist and she said Brittany had followed one of her hallucinations over to the mens ward. When Santana had one of her almost nightly nightmares it woke Quinn up. When she wasn't calming down she went to check on the two of them. When she got Santana up she realized Brittany was missing. The two of them wondered all over campus to try to find her. Santana then sent Quinn back and hopped over too. She found her with three of the men who intentions were clearly not innocent. I'm just thankful Santana didn't try to take them all. She caused a scene getting the guards attention. They're fine for the most part. Quinn feels guilty, Santana's angry. Brittany is probably the worst but that's more because of the isolation itself, she's been muttering to her self for the first 6 hours of it and then out of no where she had a fit screaming at the top of lungs for everyone to shut up and leave her alone they had to sedate her to calm her down. The last time I checked up on them she was still under."

I didn't know what to do. "So what do we do about it?"

"I have already canceled class because the kids couldn't concentrate hardly. Most are very confused and wondering what happened I didn't tell them the whole story just where they were. I'm surprised at how well she's keeping her head."

"Why are they in isolation in the first place what did they do wrong?"

"A stupid policy that needs to be changed says if someone sneaks out and something happens they go to isolation for at least 2 days. What they should have done is fire the people who were supposed to be on duty making sure no one leaves the ward. Fire the people who let those men out of their cage" I had to pull her into a hug as she was becoming a bit hysterical.

"Let's go make a report and see if we can get them out of isolation or at least visit them. You are right these girls shouldn't be punished for their mental issues at least not to this degree."

xxxxxxx

=Santana=

These people are supposed to be doctors but yet they lock Brittany up where she is left with only the voices in her head. She's never been in isolation before. Even though she does have schizophrenia she has managed to stay out of here. I press the call button. "Yes" the nurse walks up I notice her rolling her eyes when she see's it's me. "What is it Lopez

"You need to get Brittany out of here she is going to go even more crazy without human contact..." but I was cut off as the nurse just continued on her rounds. I sit onto the cot. This wasn't fair but I couldn't do anything. I just lay on the cot and tried to sleep.

When I woke up, I just looked out the tiny window to the hall. Then see about 10 people run past my door. I didn't know what was going on I couldn't hear anything in the silent rooms, but I got one of those bad feelings like the one I got when I noticed her bed empty. I started franticly pressing the butting again.

"What do you want Lopez." Gosh I really wanted to punch this nurse in the face.

"What's going on?" I ask. Hoping to God I get an answer.

"Some girl had a bitch fit down in the room a few doors down. I don't know much because I had to babysit the other patients" she said with stress on the 'babysit'. The line was cut off before I could retaliate. I kick the door out of frustration. I knew it was Brittany. They always got worse when she was alone that was why I always have Quinn check up on her. She doesn't do well alone ever especially when the 'cricket' comes back. She says he isn't the absolute worse that she ever had but he's the only one that has come back since they put her on medication. She says he told her to stab Puck for the last time I was in here.

"Santana you have visitors normally we wouldn't allow it but they are a member of the staff and were very persistent. Here she is just press the button to talk to her but we can't let you go in there." the bitch nurse says with an eye-roll on the 'staff' part I knew exactly who she was talking about."

"Santana, we're trying to get you guys out of here." Ms. P says. I smile happy to see a face of someone I don't hate.

"How's Brittany?"

"She's still sedated. Are you OK." I swallow not wanting to show just how much of a wreck I was. "That bad huh. Will is fighting with the board right now since I'm a patient they won't listen to me."

"Sucks don't it." I mummer, she smiles and weakly and nods. "Do you know what happened." I ask curious on how much she knew. About the guys..."

"Yeah I know. I talked to Dr. Lawson and she mentioned it so I could prepare Will. She didn't go into drastic detail but I heard about what it seemed like and even though they denied it, they believe you two."

"They need to put up cameras in there."

"They have them but that one was malfunctioning. Right now I'm more worried about getting you to out of here. I'm going to go check on Brittany and give you an update. Then I'm going to see how far Will has gotten." I was suddenly loving(not seducing) the first adult I'm not related to. I'm not used to this feeling. I love my parents and my sister, I really love Brittany but this is something I have never known. It was a bit overwhelming. I sit on the cot waiting her to return. "Santana..." I hope up and run back up to the door. "Brittany's awake but she didn't answer me she just shut her eyes and covered her ears."

"She does that when the voices get really bad. Thanks again for all you two are doing."

"Don't worry about it. Us crazies have to stick together." I smile a bit. "I gotta go now. Hope to see you soon." I was in a lot better mood than I was, still worried about Brittany but their was nothing I could do but wait.

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

AN: Updates are still moving. Thanks for reading and reviews are welcome.


	14. New Policies

=Will=

"What is wrong with you people this girl was attacked and your punishing her? Why the hell did you put the mens wing next to the teen wing in the first place. It's not like teens aren't going to sneak out at night but why wasn't the people who where on night watch not catch any of them. There were 6 people out the other night three of which should of been under higher security. Two of the girls were just looking for their delusional friend. Is it Brittany's fault she see's these things. It's not like she chooses to see and hear the things she does." I was fuming at the 50 something year old board members.

"Mr. Schuster, you need to calm down your too close to this." says the head. "We're trying to figure out what to do, we can't let these kids think it's ok to sneak out. Were planing on putting barbwire up so it won't be so easy to hop the wall from the teen side. The other side it's impossible. We didn't want to do it because the teen section isn't a prison or institution really, it's a special program for mentally damaged or ill kids but after last night we are going to have to. The guard on the mens side has been fired and the nurse on the girls side has been written up and moved to the day shift. We're handing this the best we could."

"Can these girls be let off early then. I'm pretty sure they got the picture." I wanted to keep arguing but I had to keep my cool and fight that another day.

"We can release Ms. Lopez now and Ms. Pierce in a few hours if she remains calm. That is the best I can do."

"Thank you." I say thankful I got that far but this wasn't over. These kids are being treated like criminals and other than the two fights I know about these kids haven't acted out that much not enough to deserving of locking them in a quiet room. These are also special needs kids. Kids who needed to be hugged and thought how to deal with their issues. I walk out of the room Emma was walking toward me. "How are they"

"Santana is holding up ok, Brittany isn't at all. I coudn't get her to respond she just sat on the cot with her eyes closed and hands over her ears muttering."

"Well their going to let Santana out now and if Brittany doen't throw another fit they'll let her out tonight. It was like pulling teeth in there Em."

"I knew it would be. I proud of you." she said reaching up to kiss me on the side of my mouth. "I'm going to go get Santana and try to talk to Brittany."

"You want me to come with you?" I ask wanting to help, it seemed that she was playing gopher.

"Sorry no men aloud in the unstable womens side, but I'll feel you in as soon as I get back." She kissed me on the cheek and walked off towards the ward.

xxxxxxxxxxx

-Brittany-

'I told you not to follow tubs' says the duck.

'I didn't ask her to follow me'

'But you need to stop sneaking off your her favorite we all know that.' goat adds.

'I say we get her to pursade Santana to go 'all Lima Heights' on the staff.' cricket joins in.

"I'm still here you know" I say wanting them all to go away, leave me alone let me sleep. Almost so bad I wanted to throw another fit. I press my hands over my ears knowing it would do no good, this was in my head. I wish I could turn them off.

'I tell you what I don't like Santana she made me go away. I say we get rid of her first.' a voice hadn't heard since those 5 weeks they separated us. He scared me. The first time he went away was when they up-ed my meds when I first came here. It was even scarier that I haven't been off them today or since that brief period. He was the only one I wish never came around.

'We're trying to take help her not make her worse'

'you guys are next you know especially you cricket, your the next one to go I mean how often do you come around anymore.'

A buzzing made them all hush thankfully. I look up at the window to see Ms. Pillsbury. I walk up to the window so I can hear better. "How are you"

"Just get me out of here." I beg. "Hows Santana. Is she.." Ms. P then holds up a finger.

"She ok their letting her out, and if you can hold it together for a few more hours. They'll let you out around 6pm."

"What time is it?" I ask hoping it was at least 5:30.

"It's a little after four. We have been fighting with the board all morning."

"We?"

"Will and I" I smile everyone see's how they look at each other. After the first day we met them told Santana that they were going to get married some day. She just smiled at me. "Try to hold it together ok."

"Can I see her?" I asked cause I really needed to see her if only to know she was alright.

"She and I both tried but I we couldn't convenice them. We barely convinced them to let me visit. Try to take a nap it'll make time pass faster."

I go back and sit down. 'She's not your friend. She's one of them you know' Cricket says. I press the pillow over my ears and look at the floor and start counting the tiles, trying my damndest to ignore my delusions.

xxxxxxxxxxx

=Santana=

I keep pacing around in our room, it was 6:15 she should have gotten out at six. If she isn't here by seven I'm going to figure out what happened and try my hardest not to end up back there in the process.

Then the door opens. I throw my arms around my favorite blonde. "You ok." I ask finally releasing her from the hug but she held on, so I just held her close.

"I had no idea how you handle it in there." she said holding on to me so tightly.

"I don't have noisy people living in my head so I can usually sleep." I say trying to break her mood. "I tried to get you out of there the moment I knew they were putting you in there too, but luckily we have two adults here that are looking out for us."

"I told you they're going to get married just give them a few years." She said finally starting to return to her normal tone.

"You must be exhausted. Let's go get a shower and we can get ready for bed." she smiled and kissed me before pulling out her night clothes. I had already laid mine out but I didn't want to leave and miss her.

After the shower we went straight back to our room, as soon as the door was shut, our lips smashed together almost missing my bed which was the closest to the door. My hand starts to grope her chest through the tank-top and her hands start tucking on the hem of my shorts. It was heated and so very wonderful. Sex with Brittany is like no other sex I've ever had and I have had a lot. Brittany isn't the only girl either but the only one that meant anything she was everything making love was supposed to be, not that I would have known before meeting her. I know by comparison and I was so happy to call her mine. We both slipped back into our underwear and tank-tops; she took the big spoon and soon we feel asleep. Only to be woken up at 1am by a new nurse.

"Get back in your own beds." she said very accusingly.

"Who the hell are you." I say without thinking.

"I'm your new night-watch and I don't let these things slide. I read up on you; you get away with far too much."

"It's OK baby." Brittany says kissing me briefly to keep me from punching the nurse in the nose. "Please she has really bad nightmares, the kind that would wake up the whole ward if I don't wake up when they first start. We won't do anything we would even put on more clothes if it makes you feel better. I just don't want her waking up terrified. Please." I looked at her with admiration at her smooth skills.

"Ok put some shorts on and I'll let you but don't think I'm not going to be checking up on you two."

"Thank you" she said randomly hugging her which she didn't return.

"Goodnight" she said shutting the door.

"You are so amazing." I say sliding into the gym shorts I wore from the shower to our room and we cuddled back into our original position.


	15. Emergency Therapy

=Santana=

I don't know the time it was or what actually woke me up. Maybe it was just one of those bad feelings I get whenever something was wrong. I look at Brittany next to me she has all of the covers and shivering muttering all I could make out was 'hurt her'. I pull her into a hug trying to silence her. Whatever this was it scared her badly. I rock her back and forth until she wakes up and buries her face into my chest. We were having real role reversal and I had no idea how to comfort her. "What is it, Britt?"

"He wants to hurt you." She says still gripping me, I wasn't sure who or what she was talking about. Then she lets go of me and moves to her own bed. I start to follow her and she shakes her head. "Don't come near me." She mutters and then she hugs a pillow crying into it. I was at a loss at what was going on.

"Who wants to hurt me?" I ask trying to stay calm.

"Cricket and a different voice that I haven't named yet but he converted Cricket and now they want to hurt you. It's only a matter of time before he converts the others."

"Baby, have you been taking your meds?" she nods a yes. I walk a little closer.

"Get away from me!" she yells in a very un-Brittany like way. I back off and sit back on my bed. It was painful to watch her cry into her pillow murmuring for them to go away. "I'm so sorry. I'm afraid I'm going to hurt you." 

"I promise your not going to hurt me." I say walking over to her disregarding her protests. I sit behind her and envelope her with a blanket and my arms. "Do you need an emergency section with a therapist?" I ask trying anything to help her. "I'll go with you if you want."

"Yes. I think that would be a good idea." she says finally. "Please don't leave me, I don't want to go alone. It's dark out there."

I pick her up and toss her a pair of sweat pants and a hoodie. Then put mine on myself. "Come on babe." I help her up off the floor where she was getting a shoe from under the bed. Though the nurse gave us a little trouble she called the office and said we're on are way so that we wouldn't 'run off' things have been a lot stricter since the incident the other day. Brittany was pretty quiet all the way to the office; I wasn't sure if it was out of fear, annoyance or not having much to say. All I could do was tell her the same things she gave to me when I had one of my nightmares. I had no idea what was going on in her head. It isn't like I don't sympathize with her, I just don't understand it. Just like she doesn't understand why I'm so scared of a man who's been dead for nearly a decade. Logically we know we shouldn't but that is what makes it so frustrating, we cannot explain why these things scare us shitless and it sucks.

We walk into the office and he just waves us in. It was different from our usual therapist because ours was sleeping he was more or less just for emergencies, I just wasn't expecting a man. "So what's going on with you two tonight." he asks

I bite my lip and obviously tense up. Feelings of anxiety and distrust imminently rise. Brittany squeezes my hand whispers that she loves me in my ear and explains to the male doctor, "One of the voices is telling me to hurt my girlfriend. And he's converting the others too." I never got used to her calling me her girlfriend, it was something I always had trouble saying out loud, especially to men. I feel that they automatically sexualize us and makes their own porn movie in their head. But Brittany said it as naturally as saying hello; It's one of her many qualities that I love about her.

"Is this your girlfriend?" she nods. "When did this voice emerge."

"When I was in isolation 2 days ago. He said I needed to get rid of her for making him go away. I want _him_ to go away. He has convinced Cricket to go along with him, I'm afraid he's going to get the others too. I don't think I can fight all five of them, and if move voices return it'll just be worse. Their going to make me hurt her. I'm scared I will hurt her..." I just pull her into a hug as she started to tear up.

"Have you been taking your medicine"

"Yes, even-though they tell me not to."

"Okay, I'm going to give you a light sedative," then he said to me. "You'll make sure she gets back to bed alright?" I nod. "Tomorrow morning I want you to talk to Dr. Lawson about this new voice, she knows more about you and the medications your already on. I'm here if either of you need me, I don't get many visitors at three in the morning.

She takes the pill and we headed back to the dorm. She was half asleep by the time we got back to our room. I take off the sweatpants and sweater lay her in her bed and I was about to lay in mine. "Stay with me." she said sleepily, and I happily snuggled in behind her wrapping my arms around her, pulling her as close as possible. Breathing in the scent of her shampoo, I drifted off to sleep. Brittany didn't wake up the rest of the night but I not being on any drugs wasn't so lucky.

_I woke up in a beautiful bedroom, next to my beautiful wife. The sun was drifting in saying it was time to get out of bed. I lightly shake my blonde awake. "Five more minutes." she whines. I kiss her on the cheek and get up to go do my morning routine: shower, start the coffee and eggs I put them all on her duckie tv-tray, deciding to give my amazing wife breakfast in bed, but then I hear the most terrifying sound. Brittany was screaming at the top of her lungs but then it was cut off. I drop the tray and the dishes make a terrible shattering noise. I sprint to our bedroom and I see him pinning her on the bed one hand over her mouth the other in her nighty. I want to move, I want to shove him off of her but it is then I notice one of the big guys from the other night grabbing me from behind. I scream but nothing comes out. Now he is holding me in his lap groping my chest while I'm forced to watch my uncle rape my Brittany. Knowing they'll switch off eventually and she would be forced to watch the same thing. It was like a vicious circle of hell, and there was nothing that I could do about it. _

I sit up covered in sweat and crying. I lay back down holding Brittany as close as humanly possible. No one was going to hurt her. She remains sleeping soundly despite me soaking her shirt with tears. These nightmares aren't getting any better. Maybe it's time I tell Lawson just how bad they are.

**AN: Please review, it's helpful to know what ya'll liked and didn't like. It also motivates me to write more. I don't like asking for reviews but I really appreciate them.**


	16. What else can I do

=Brittany=

I wake up in Santana's death grip on me from behind the back of my shirt was damp. She had a nightmare and I felt bad that I was to dopy to comfort her. I start trying to pry her fingers off my waist so I can start getting ready to talk to Dr. Lawson. "Goo Mornin" she mumbled into my back, still not letting me go.

"Baby, we need to get up to see the doctor." I say trying to get up again but she held on. "Really bad dream huh." I say snuggling back next to her but facing her this time. She gave a small nod. "Do you want to talk about it?" I ask pulling her to a hug.

"I'm never going to get better am I. Everyone is getting better but us. Quinn is going home with Berry's dads in a few months. Berry is learning that when she doesn't get her way it doesn't mean that she's no good. Sam and Mercedes aren't letting food control them as much. Blaine's going to be going home with Kurt by the summer. Tina and Mike are talking more. Puck isn't flirting with everything that moves and has tits since I broke his hand nor is he coming on as strong. Finn and Artie aren't as sad anymore. But if a male stranger sits next to me I start tensing up and wanting to run the other direction and God forbid someone one touch you..." she then crumbles into my chest starting to soak my front of my shirt.

I just comb my fingers though her hair. "You have a much darker history babe, and other than eating disorders and depression Rachel and I are the only ones that have been diagnosed with anything and I'm not even sure if 'narcissistic personality disorder' is a real illness I'd call it spoiled brat syndrome." I got a laugh out of that one and I savored it, knowing she was going to have a rough morning. "You have gotten better you came in thinking you nothing more than a sex toy and even tried to seduce your caseworker. You thought that you weren't allowed to say no. Now you respect yourself more but because you had to talk about what was done to you, you have these nightmares. We are getting better we're just started out a lot sicker than the others."

"You always know the right think to say. I think I'm just shaken up about the other day. I was so scared for you. I'm just thankful I kept my head long enough to call for help instead of trying to take them on myself." Our legs were tangled I was planting little kisses along her jaw line up to her ear. "How are you this morning? Are they still bothering you?"

"The only ones that have talked to me this morning are Tubs and Goat but they didn't say much. Tubs told me not to follow him and Goat told me that I needed to get up."

"See even you are getting better. I keep having the same nightmare. Whether we're here, at our home in the suburbs. In an apartment in New York or at my uncles old house it's the same thing. It boils down to me not being able to protect you. Some are more graphic than others some feels so real but every time I fail and you get hurt."

I just continue to hold her combing my fingers in her hair as she sobbed on. I didn't know what else to say to her. I was scared that I would hurt her, well not me but them. " I have bad dreams about me hurting you, that's what shook me up so much last night. I'm scared that I won't be able to fight them away one day and I will hurt you. I want them all to go away."

"I do too Britt, I can't imagine having violent people in my head."

"But you do San. You said that there's always a voice in the back of your head saying mean things..." I was going to say her uncle saying she was worthless, and other horrible names and the aftermath and all the damage he had done to her mind. That still have major effects on her today, but she was already crying I didn't want to surface those right at this point.

"But it's different, he's not telling me to hurt you. He's telling me I don't deserve you that because I am just his whore and now he gets to have you too, I am never strong enough to protect you. I know it's silly that he still can control me from the grave. I must sound really pathic." she continues to sob loudly and incoherently into my shirt.

I don't know what to do for her I just sit up laying her in my lap. It didn't seem like she was going to stop anytime soon. I don't know what triggered this or what I can do about it, but if I don't stop her, she's going to cry herself sick. She's done it before. "San you need to stop your going to give yourself a migraine." when she doesn't stop I set her to the side and got dressed. I then slid on a pair of sweat pants and her hoodie. I didn't know what to do but maybe I can find someone who would. I pick her up she just wraps her arms around me and I carry her bridal style. I would have made a joke if she wasn't sobbing violently into my shoulder. One of the nurses offer to take her but I shook my head knowing she wasn't going to be okay if anyone else touched her right now.

'You should just take care of yourself right now. Just leave her in the room and stop breaking your back for her'

"Shut it Cricket." I say aloud he retaliates but I continue to ignore him.

I knew where I was going even if the 115lb load was getting heavy. Someone opened the door to the office for me. She may be mad at me later but she needed to get some help. "Brittany! What's going on" Dr. Lawson jumps up I shake my head violently to keep her from touching her, and lay her on the couch that we all sat on. I then lift her head up and sit down myself. She re-clings back to me and buries her head into my stomach with her back to our therapist "What's going on?" Lawson asked collecting herself. She had her long brown hair pinned up and though she was pushing fifty she was still very pretty.

"I don't know last night was rough for me and they gave me a sleeping pill so I was out most of the night. This morning I tried to get her to talk about them like you told me to and now she's like this now. I don't know what to do."

"Santana." she starts, she rolls over to look at her with puffy eyes. "Do you know where you are?" she starts out lightly she just nods. "Santana you need to talk about this if you don't I can't help you."

After serval minutes she said, "I can't protect her from the assholes of this world. I'm a coward." I comb my fingers though her hair trying to reassure her that I was ok and not going anywhere. We didn't go to glee club or any of our other classes. We talked to Lawson most of the day. She decided to start me on a new medication that they didn't want to start until I was at least 17 but since my birthday was in a few weeks and old voices were starting to come back she and my parents agreed. They put Santana on a new anxiety medication to help with the dreams, since the sleep-aids just make it that much harder to wake her up and therefore calm after a bad night.

Now I am laying in our room letting her sleep soundly because she didn't sleep hardly last night between me and her nightmares. Ms. P came by to check on us but didn't want to wake her up so didn't stay long. Quinn and Rachel stopped by too. Though the voices were talking to me and screaming in my head I ignored them though they were giving me a headache. It was my turn again to take care of her.

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-Artie-

I don't remember much about the actual accident. What I remember is my mom had just picked me up from my baseball practice. We were talking about what we were going to do for dinner. Then I heard a horrid metal scratching then everything faded to black.

When I woke up I was covered with wires. There was a steady beeping noise.

"Arnold , he's awake." I hear my mom says before sliding my glasses on.

"Hey little guy." this time my dad says grabbing a hold of my hand. I try to sit up but couldn't. My dad then puts a hand on my chest laying me back down. I try to ask why I couldn't but my voice wouldn't work either.

Then it dawned on me how long had I been here the window showed the start of fall colored leaves just yesterday was July. My little league team was doing so good, we were one game away from the Ohio world series we were supposed to play Columbus next week, what were they going to do without their first baseman. "Baby it's OK" my mom says stroking my hair when I started to cry. I was so scared.

"Why can't I feel my legs" I manage to choke out. My parents then got a real somber look on their faces and looked to each other very sadly. "Mom, Dad why can't I feel my legs" I said as panic started to set in.

"Oh my god Annie." My dad said now starting to tear up covering his mouth.

My mom always being the calm collective one sat next to me. "What is the last thing you remember baby."

"You picked me up from practice we were talking about what we were going to do for dinner. I think I then heard metal noises. What happened?"

"That was about three months ago, there was an car accident. Baby you have a serious spinal injury. We don't know if you'll ever be normal again."

After years of physical therapy I had only gained some control in my pelvis up. I never played baseball again.

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AN: Artie's bit I have had for a long time but I haven't been able to find a spot for it so I'm just shoving it here. As for the rest I had to retype it and can't even remember what I typed the first time around because my computer ate it. I like to get reviews thanks for the ones who reviewed last time.


	17. goodbye

=Santana=

With my new medication the nightmares have toned down I still have them about every other night but they're not as graphic, usually. It was early morning and Brittany and I are in our tanks and panties. She is kissing my neck making it very hard to think about anything else. I move to kiss her full on the lips. She wraps her arms around my shoulders and slips her tonuge into my mouth. I gladly except it and continue to kiss her. Her hands start to go south and then I notice very dark bruising along her wrists, they looked like finger prints. I gently grab her by the shoulders sitting up. "Britt, who did this to you." it had been weeks since she followed Lord Tubbington so it couldn't have been that. I turn on the light to get a better look.

"I don't know I just woke up this morning and they were there, they don't hurt much." she leans over and continues kissing me obviously horny.

"Baby, we need to figure out who hurt you."

"Can it wait?" she said sliding her hands up my top. As hard as it was I had to tell her no I had to.

"No Britt it can't wait. Someone hurt you." I start examining her further. I start to notice other bruises on her hands, legs, they were all over her. Then I see them some of the darkest bruises between her thighs. I start crying pulling her into a tight hug. Wondering if I should look further into it if she didn't remember. I tried hard to think of a time she wasn't in my sight.

"San what's going on" I take a deep breath, slip into my shorts and wrap her in a blanket, and scoop her up. "Where are we going?"

"I'm taking you to the hospital. Someone hurt you and I don't know who or how."

"San..San come on wake up." I sit up gasping to see my Brittany unhurt with her arms waiting for me. I look her over one more time to be sure before falling in to the hug. "It's ok." she whispered holding me close. "Do you want to talk about it." I shake my head lightly. She just held me humming some tune, and I drift back to sleep.

_I still couldn't hear clearly even though the _paramedic was_ asking me questions. I am looking around for my sister. "Where am I" I manage to ask. I was so cold despite being wrapped tightly in blankets and laying on a stretcher. "Where's Sebina? What about my uncle."_

"_Easy, we're taking you to the hospital your sister is with the police man saying what she knows. She only has a few bruises you are in a lot rougher shape." a female voice says moving into view to move my hair out of my face. "You uncle is in another car."_

"_Am I going to go to jail?" I ask almost sure she was going to say yes. I did stab my uncle and my sister saw everything, but I'd take jail over being his plaything any day. _

"_No pumpkin, your parents are going to be at the hospital waiting for you. We're going to try to get you better before asking any questions." the rest of the ride was smooth they had already started an IV and wrapped my head. It felt dream like almost that or I was slipping in and out of consciousness. I never told them anything but just from examining me they knew I was raped repeatedly and I had a concussion and a broken wrist. My uncle died before they got him to the hospital. He had only fingered my sister but it was enough to emotionally damage her, just not as damaged as it had me. My parents were heartbroken and asked me why I didn't blow the whistle sooner and I never gave them a straight answer. Then we tried to forget. My sister bounced back pretty well but I never did. _

_What my parents don't know is that because it was drilled into my head so much I never said no. I slept with serval other men. If a boy hit on me at school I flirted back and often was very forward. One gym teacher most have known my history because he took full advantage of it, giving detentions for the smallest things that any other student would get away with and then bringing me into his office. It went on from the 6th-8th grade, only 2 people know about him Lawson and Brittany. At the start of my freshman year, I beat the crap out of some girl for saying some sort of racial slur she said because I slept with her boyfriend. The slur set me off. I broke her wrist, nose, and apparently hurt her back but I don't see how. I guess what landed me here was kissing my caseworker and grabbing his junk he was a gentleman though and sat me back down. I had thought I did something wrong and started crying real hard. I guess that's why he fought them putting me in a juvenal correction facility. After my parents told him everything they knew about me, I landed here. _

I'm shaken awake again and roll over into her accepting the hug. "Your going to get better" Brittany says and starts to sing to me again. I play with her blonde hair laying on her chest as she rubs circles on my back. I didn't have another bad dream that night.

=Brittany=

'She's so vulnerable now. It'll be easy. Snap her Neck!' I still haven't named him because I want him to go away. I don't want to name him. He was never my friend he always told me to do bad things, but now he was targeting the love of my life and it was very threatening.

"I'm not going to listen to you." I say knowing he won't go away.

"And I'm going to keep pressing until I get you to a point where you will do what ever I say. Your going to kill her eventually I just have to break you in."

"You won't be able to fight us all" Cricket adds.

I look down at Santana sleeping soundly again. "I'm sorry" I kiss her before sliding out from under her. I scribble a note and put it on the nightstand. I wasn't going to let me hurt her. "Goodbye, Darling,"

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**AN: Please review, it's helpful to know what ya'll liked and didn't like. It also motivates me to write more. I don't like asking for reviews but I really appreciate them.**


	18. Finding Brittany

=Santana=

I wake up to find the room empty. I sit up thinking she might have just gone to the bathroom, until I find the note.

_Santana, I love you, but I have to go away. They are really getting to me and I can't trust myself with you anymore. I know you think we can fight this but I can't take the chance of hurting you. Have Rachel move in with you when Quinn goes home. She'll take care of you and watch out for your nightmares. I won't be able to live with myself if they make me hurt or kill you. I won't tell you where I'm going because if I do you'll find me and then I could hurt you. I love you more than I love anything else in this world. Tell everybody in glee club I love them too._

_Love you always, Brittany._

"Shit" I barely remember to put my shorts on before running out the door. "Where is she?" I all but scream at the nurse.

She just looks at me confused, "I don't know what your talking about Ms. Lopez." I drop the note in her lap. She then picks up the phone and franticly dials. I don't wait for her to handle this, I grab the note and run out the door cursing because I forgot my shoes. I go to Lawson's office thinking I should start there.

"Santana! What's going on."

"Brittany ran away, here's the note she left me. I don't know where she went and what if she gets hurt? what if she hurts herself!"

"How long ago was this written?"

"How the hell am I supposed to know. The last time I woke up last night was around 4am and she sung to me until I fell back to sleep. Do you think it's a reaction to her new medication"

"No she was hearing them before, security is already looking for her."

"Just like they were looking out for her when three meat heads attacked her!"

"Santana you need to calm down."

Gosh this women was getting on my nerves. "Don't tell me to calm down my girlfriend is wondering around all alone and probably not dressed properly or..."

"Santana you can't help her if you don't calm down. Now where do you think she went." She said sitting me down. I had no idea, she could be anywhere. She could just be hiding out in the bushes somewhere, she could have hopped the wall, any of them she is a gymnast. For all I know she's in the trunk of some car because she wants to hitchhike to Disney Land, and is far too trusting of people. "Santana we're going to find her" she added hugging me I crumbled into her arms crying my eyes out.

-Will-

Things have been pretty normal for the last few weeks next month the first of my glee kids are going home and all of them have shown improvement. I thought today would bee no different. I get up to the gates and see about 10 police cars, they let me in though I run up to the wreck room already expecting Emma to be sitting waiting for me with looking nervous and very serious. "What's going on?" I ask bracing myself for the answer hoping Santana didn't have another outburst or that Sam wasn't going on a hunger strike that Rachel isn't taking a vow of silence because she didn't get her way but I would gladly take any of those in exchange for what was coming.

"Brittany took off last night, they've confined everyone to their quarters with exception of Santana who's with the search party. They didn't want her to go with them but Dr. Lawson and she both insisted saying she knew the most about Brittany and would more than likely go looking for herself if they didn't let her. She left a note Will." She said handing me a photo copy of "Hello Kitty" stationary with Brittany's writing.

I look over the note a few times before responding, "What can I do"

"I don't know. They've been looking since about 6am they have people stationed all over the property and are still looking all around but they still can't find her."

"She can't have gone far can she, did she take anything with her?"

"That I'm not sure about, the only thing Santana noticed was missing was her stuffed goat, but they didn't search their room or anything mainly because Santana said they were wasting time and kicked them out."

I paused for a second, "Is there any post that needs more people?"

"No but you can keep me company." I smile and sit next to her.

=Brittany=

'What will you do with out your medication? More of the voices are just going to come back, you were doing well with Santana.' Goat says.

I am still sitting on the roof of the tallest building granted it's the roof of the Mens ward and only two stories. None of them can get up here; They're too out of shape and heavy to hoist themselves up those trees and scale these buildings.

"I came up here to protect her you of all people should know that, He's telling me to kill her, Julio." I say feeling really silly that I just called a goat a person.

'Do you really think Berry can chase her bad dreams away? Your the only one that can do that, not even the doctors. How do you think she'll fair without you? Who do you think will keep her from beating the shit out of everyone.' Duck adds.

'Come on how long do you think you can hide here. For one even-though I closer to my cigar guy, it's too dangerous for you to be here. For two it's too cold for you here the winds are strong and this is Ohio in the Fall it's only going to get colder and your in sweatpants and a thin hoodie.' Lord Tubbington said. I looked down at everyone looking for me I see Santana walking with the police team very worried, she was dressed but only in sweats and one of the officers jackets that was at least three sizes too big.

'We're not going to turn on you, Cricket was never one of us. Go back to her.' the goat continues. I nod and head tree that I used to climb up here. I zip the goat into my hoodie and hop on the biggest branch up this high. I start climbing to the trunk of the tree and then I hear a snap.

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AN: I love reviews they help me write quicker and better, knowing what I'm doing right and what I need to do better.


	19. Hospitals

=Santana=

Though being with these policemen has heightened my anxiety, Brittany ran off and they can't find her without me. To be honest these guys have taught me that not all men are pigs. The chubby one next to me was the nicest. "So how long have you two been dating?"

"I don't know when we made it official but it's been about 2 years since our first kiss." I shiver a little. I didn't take the time to get dress or primped properly, I just ran a brush though my hair slid on some pants and my thin hoodie.

"Here" he said putting his jacket over my shoulders without actually touching me. "Your too skinny and I have my own built in insolation."

"Thank you." I say sliding my arms in to the big jacket and snapping the first snap, so it could stay on.

"I know this may be too personal but how did you end up here?"

I swallowed, "You're right that is too personal. Lets just say I was traumatized as a child."

"Sorry, I shouldn't of asked." We started heading to the mens ward making me even more nervous. Obviously he saw me tense up because he said, "don't worry we'll protect you." I weakly nod and continue following them. The winds were very strong I actually felt like if I jumped it would send me gliding a bit. Then we hear a loud snapping of a tree branch and I hear Brittany's scream. We run over to her. The chubby officer grabs ahold of the neck of the jacket trying to hold me back I slide out of the jacket, and drop next to her.

I was shaking not because of the cold but because of the sight of her. Her leg bent at an odd angle, but other than that and a few scrapes I couldn't tell what was wrong just by looking at her. She was unconscious and the leader was on his cell calling an ambulance. "Don't touch her." one of the officers said to me. I just wanted to hold her but I just sat on the soft dirt in front of her waiting for the sirens.

"We convinced the doctors to let you go with her but we have to stay with you. Her parents are going to meet us at the hospital." I might of said thank you but I was more concerned with the sight in front of me. My Brittany was hurt and I couldn't help her. I knew I shouldn't touch her but I just wanted to wrap her into my arms. Sitting in the ambulance with her was very deja vu. I watched them strap her to the stretcher and put a neck brace on. I didn't talk to the paramedics not wanting to distract them from helping Brittany. I didn't know what was going on the started and IV and then they let me hold the hand they started it on telling me to be just careful. I rub my finger over the heart that she drew in class the other day, SL & BP. I loved her so much. We got to the hospital and they took her away.

I feel someone grab my hand causing me to jump a foot. I look up to see Mr. Schue and sigh in relieve. "Is she going to OK" I ask my voice betrays me making me feel self-conscious because it was so weak and scared.

"We don't know yet." he said dropping my hand, but I turn and wrap my arms around him. I needed a hug Mr. Schue was far from my first choice but the only one around that I trusted enough to touch. His hug was gentle and reminded me of my dad's hugs. We sat down and waited for Brittany's parents to show up.

"Where's our baby?" her mother says with the same worry as I felt right at this point. I just couldn't move or talk hardly but Mr. Schue rescued me.

"She's still in x-ray." Mrs. Pierce sits down on the other side of me and grabbed my hand and squeezed it once and held on. I gave her a weak smile. I had met Brittany's parents a few times but didn't know them that well. They didn't react any different than they would if I was a boy, in fact once they found out I was clean they've treated me like their own daughter and told me that they trusted me with her far more than they would any boy. I lay on her shoulder but didn't go to sleep. No one would be able to keep my nightmares at bay and didn't want to miss Brittany when she does wake up.

Finally a man in a white lab coat comes out. "She's real lucky" he started. "She broke her leg in two places, sprained the other ankle, she has a concussion and a few fractured ribs but she will recover."

I almost wanted to shout how was that lucky but then I remembered just how high of a fall she had. "Can we see her?" Mrs. Pierce asked getting up. I get up with her; hoping they let me see her as I have no relation.

"Sure but only two of you at a time, she's not awake yet but you can see her."

"You two go, your her parents." I say I was reluctant but it was true. They had raised her for 16 years and I have only known her for three of those.

"Nah I'm going to be staying with her all night you go with Susan and I'll wait out here." Mr. Pierce said I smile at his faint Dutch accent and for the second time that day I hugged a male and said thanks.

We walk in and see her leg in a baby blue cast up to the knee. She has about 8 stitches along the hair line on her fore head. There were more stitches on both of her arms. I just drop beside her bed and lay my head next to her. Hoping they won't make me leave tonight but I knew they were going to.

"You know she's been climbing things since she was able to pull herself up. That's why we put her in gymnastics. Do you know why she climbed so high." I almost forgot that Brittany's mom was in the room.

"I woke up and found this note." I reached in to my pocket and handed her the folded up piece of paper. I say not wanting to rehash everything for the third time. "I'm sorry I didn't know she took off until she was gone."

"Sweetheart, don't blame yourself, we don't blame you at all."

"Well you should, I'm the reason she took off." I say feeling very bitter and guilty.

I then feel a hand on my shoulder, I flinch a little and he quickly removed it. I turn to see the paramedic who rode with her. "I thought she might miss this." He said holding out my goat. I hug him instantly drawing in the comfort he symbolized. I then put it under Brittany's arm. "Wrap it up they want you back at LIMH at six." I didn't realize I was pouting. "Don't be too upset their only keeping her for two nights if there are no problems and you can come back tomorrow morning." I nod still not liking the idea of going back without her.

"San? Stay with Quinn tonight, she'll at least wake you up before they get too bad."

I just grab her hand and hugged it. "You just keep scaring me you know that? Your going to give me gray hair before I'm twenty."

"Sorry. I'm thirsty." I pore her a glass of water and she gulps it down. "Can I keep Julio tonight, he smells like you." I nod and kiss her goodnight before leaving the room.

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AN: Thank you for all the reviews, keep them up. I have too much time on my hands is why updates have been so rapid. I'm dog sit rich people pay me to watch over their house and pet their animals. When I'm not dog siting. I'm making sure my dad (who also needs a sitter) doesn't set fire to himself, the yard, or the house, two of which has happened.


	20. Stairs and Duckies

=Quinn=

After Ms. Pillsbury filled us in on what happened to Brittany we just hung out in our rooms. Well Mercedes and Rachel's room. "What are we going to do guys." Rachel started taking over like she always did with everything. I found it cute but everyone else found it annoying and I've told her that but it does no good. "Quinn has decided to take care of Santana while Brittany is in the hospital but we all are going to step up if we have a female Artie on our hands."

"Only for 6 months and after six weeks she'll just be on crutches. What we need to do is treat them about the same cause their still the two that have the furthest to go." Mercedes says, "we can help with the physical stuff but she's already going to feel like a freak with us. We don't need to be anymore sensitive than we already are around them."

"I was talking about how we have half a flight of stairs to climb to get to our rooms and we're going to have to carry her up those stairs at least twice a day, and she's going to hurt her back trying to do it herself." Rachel continues. I didn't realize I was grinning stupidly until Tina elbowed gently me in the ribs.

"We can manage. The guy's manage with Artie." Tina says quietly.

"But the guys are stronger and Brittany isn't heavy but she's taller than all of us, and there are only so many people Santana will let help and you know guys aren't allowed in the dorm after 8pm, and Quinn's going home next month."

"No I'm not. I was planing to go home with your dads but I still would have to go to therapy, and I'm needed here." I say, thankful I don't have to say that I just feel awkward moving in with my girlfriend's dads without my girlfriend.

"They might be able to make an exception. She trust Mr. Schue, Kurt and Blaine enough and I think she'd be ok with Sam, Mike and Finn as long as she's there for it all. She has trust issues but she's getting a lot better." Mercedes argues. I went back to staring at Rachel trying to figure out what I like about her most. Maybe it's the way she is so confident in herself, maybe it's that voice, I don't know.

"It's almost six Santana will be back soon. She's going to be depressed and in a sorry mood so let's try not to bombard her with questions, she's been getting that all day and if I'm right Santana already blames herself." I say standing up.

"Then what do we do?" Tina said.

"She's probably exhausted so Quinn and I were just going to sit with her with a book and try to get her to sleep we can be an ear if she needs it. Tomorrow she's gong to wake up and go back to the hospital. Let's just go with the flow and make sure she doesn't end up in isolation." Rachel says. I grab her and and we walk over to Santana's room.

We see her walking up to us. "Don't try to make me feel better; don't feel like talking but feel free to watch me sleep just keep it down if you get it on. I'll take Britt's bed". Just like that she laid down and went to bed leaving me and Rachel sitting on the bed staring at her facing the wall and crying silently.

=Santana=

Surprisingly I slept through the night. I woke up real early around 5am. I look over at my bed and see Quinn holding Rachel and I can't help but feel jealous. My girlfriend was on a bunch of pain killers in a hospital bed. I didn't bother I just shower get dressed and headed to Lawson's office I was ready to head back to the hospital.

Finally after some persistent pressing one of the security guards escorted me back to the hospital. I walk into her room and she's sleeping still holding my goat. Mr. Pierce was sleeping too in that very uncomfortable recliner that they have in all hospital rooms. There was a Wal-mart bag with a bunch of metallic sharpies. I pick out a shinny yellow one and start to draw a duck on the foot of the cast. I then got an orange one and drew the feet and bill of the duck, and then signed it in pink with a heart at the tail of my name.

"Your back." She said smiling down at me. She looked a lot better then she did yesterday. The color was back in her face her hair was clean of all the blood that matted it. "So hows everyone back there?"

"Their all worried about us. Rachel and Quinn slept in my bed last night they didn't have to chase away any nightmares but I'm not holding my breath for tonight."

"Well they said they might let me head back tonight. Mom got my grandmothers old wheelchair and she was about the same size as me they just need to mess with the paper work and instructions on how to care for my leg and stitches. Sorry if I'm a bit lame in bed."

"I'm still just happy your alive. I mean you fell from about 15 feet. Have 'they' been bothering to you since the fall."

"Not the ones that sent me to that roof in the first place. It's not the first time I fell out of a tree you know. When I was 7, the real Lord Tubbington got stuck and I climbed up to get him out he scratched me and I fell only broke my wrist it wasn't as high but after that my parents took me to a class on tree climbing and they taught me how to fall; they also told me not to climb so high but that never stopped me before." I smile at her rambling and sat up in bed with her.

"Does it hurt?" I ask nodding to her leg.

"Only a little bit. It hurts more when I forget that I have it and try to roll over. Your going to have to help me bathe, unless you want one of the nurses to do that." she said sarcastically knowing I would say yes, to helping her shower.

"You know I will, I don't even let the nurses touch you with clothes on." I say grabbing her hand.

"What are we going to do about the stairs? The guys aren't allowed to be in the girls dorm after 8pm. I won't be able to climb them at all for at least 3 weeks."

"We've thought about that. Their going to have to make an exception, we'll send the boy's on their way afterward and they are going to have to accept that I can only trust a handful of guys. I will carry you before I let one of them do it. I don't care if I break my back, no strange guy is going to touch you."

"I love you...ooh a ducky how cute thank you Sanny, you can draw all over my cast as soon as the rest of the glee club signs it."

"But I signed it first." I snicker until her dad let out a loud snore turning us both into hyenas.

"Huh...oh. Hi Santana." he said sitting up straightening his shirt. "When did you get here." only making us erupt in laughter again.

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><p>AN: So the name of this chapter is just a hybrid of POVs I couldn't think of any other way to combine them it's saved as Bartie on my computer. Please review or I'll start holding back updates. I just have too much time on my hands even today when I was chasing my godson around.<p> 


	21. Another Sleepless Night

**AN: This is another strong M chapter, including fairly graphic rape. **

=Santana=

We both ride home with the escort who was a burly man and could help her get out of the van. Even if I have kind of gotten to know him with all the escorting he's been doing, I will still be watching him like a hawk. It was hard enough to watch the paramedics and doctors touch her but she was bleeding and broken and I didn't know what do. Once they took her in the back room, it was out of my hands which only made it worse. Now she was in my sight and she wasn't going to leave it.

"Alright I'm going to need you to wrap your hands around my neck so I can hoist you into your chair. I hold my breath as he lifted her and sat her in her chair. "I assume you want to take over now." Damn straight, I thought but knew better to voice it when Brittany was giving me the 'be nice' glare, which I could not turn down even if she wasn't hurt. "OK, they want you to go to the wreck room to pick up the tape and trash-bags for the bathing. Take care I'll see you in a week for her check up." I just nod at him and expect her leg making sure it was properly elevated and she was comfy before heading to the wreck hall. I knew what was going on the glee club had planned some sort of party. They didn't have to tell me about it but I could sense it.

Of course I was right there was a welcome party waiting for us and even-though she was only gone for two days, we were greatful. After everyone signed her cast, guys included, Mr. Schue informed me that he and 2 of the glee guys would help carry her up to our ward. I chose Blaine and Mike because they seemed the most able and one was gay with capital G, the other is very nice even if he's very quiet. I would have chose Kurt but I doubt he could left Rachel much let Brittany.

After one of the longest showers I ever heard of I removed the trashbag and helped her to bed before putting a few pillows under her legs. and crawling in with her. "I'm a lot of trouble aren't I.." she said her voice laced with guilt.

"Nah, I'm paying you back for all of those sleepless nights. Just don't climb so high next time." I say kissing her.

"What if you have a nightmare I won't be able to wake you as easy, and I'm on some heavy pain killers that knock me out, even if I could I may not be able to hear you at all." she said.

"Don't worry about it right now wake me up if you can, if you don't wake up I'm sure Quinn or Rachel will. It's my turn to take care of you." I kiss her and turn off the lamp. Sleep came fast but it wasn't dreamless.

_I wake up feeling for my lover but she wasn't there I start looking around our house for her. I check the kids rooms. I see our oldest son holding on to is baseball bat mumbling about plays. I see our middle child sleeping upside-down with her stuffed unicorn and our baby sleeping in his crib. I check , the kitchen, my office. I finally checkesd our basement or gym where she did all her dancing and I see her covered in blood and holding a razor. I run over to her and try desperately to get the blood to stop and revive her but she was gone. Then I find the note._

_xxxxxxx_

_My family, I'm sorry I had to do this. I'd rather kill myself then hurt any of you. They kept telling me to do it, all of them. They even told me how. I wasn't going to let that happen. To my oldest son, Lucas I am sorry I didn't get to see your baseball improve anymore, don't give up on it because you are amazing. To my only daughter Sarah I hope that you never loose your magic. And to Patrick, I wish you every happiness and I wish I would have gotten to see you take your first steps. Santana, I love you more than anything, that is why I had to leave. I don't know how to fight them anymore. I've tried but all 8 of them are telling me to cut your throats in your sleep or worse. Goodbye my loves._

xxxxxx

_I fold up the note and lay down next to my wife and cried._

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><p>I sit straight up and look next to me we're back, crammed on the small bed I see her sleeping soundly with her blue cast still elevated on the pillows. I carefully hug her and lay on her shoulder until sleep takes me again.<p>

"_I loved the movie I thought that the little penguins were adorable." I just laugh at her childishness and continue walking to the subway holding her hand. I loved New York we didn't get the stares we got back in Ohio; it felt great being able to love on my girlfriend without being judged. "Why do they have to put the subway so far away from the theater." I shrugged my shoulders._

"_Well look what we have here, a couple of dykes flaunting what they are." I tense up a bit as a couple of men in hoodies stepped in to block our path. I try to walk around them but they separate and block us from there I start to turn us around to go into the nearest shop but being 11pm it was closed. I turn around to find 3 men looking at us like an evening snack. _

_I try to sprint passed them not letting go of Brittany's hand. One of the men grab me by the hair sending Brittany to the sidewalk. I try to scream but by now he has me in a hold with his hand over my mouth. One of the other guy's have Brittany in the same hold. I start thrashing but it did no good. The three men manhandle us into an alley and pulled f us into a van. "I think we should fuck them straight" says the guy that had me already started undressing me. I continue to struggle but was doing nothing but wasting my stamina Brittany was doing the same thing. I then feel a hard hand slap me across the face. By now I was just in my underwear. One of the men had started driving I didn't know where I was just trying to get out of his grip so I could help Britt. He had managed to wiggle out of his jeans and boxers. He pulled me by the hair and into his lap forcing my head down to his erection. "Come on, open up." When I refused he yanked my hair back causing me to yelp and he shoved himself into my mouth. "Bite me and I will kill you and your girlfriend slowly. There are so many fun ways I could kill you. If you are good, we might let you go." I felt defeated I look over at Brittany she was still struggling but was only covered by her bikini style bottom which he was trying to get off. Then the man fighting with her pulled a knife and sliced them off slicing her in the process. I was forced to take my eyes off of her when he yanked my head up and shoved me back down choking me. _

_The van was in park now and the driver came to the back and entered me from behind I glance to see Brittany struggling as her attacker thrusted into her. They shuffled around us taking turns on who doubles up and who gets who. Finally they were done with us, and I was glad the ordeal was over. I was hurting all over and I'm sure Brittany was too. " Now that you both have been fucked good by real cocks, maybe you can rethink your lifestyle" He tossed us a pack of mens t-shirts that were way too big "Put them on." he spat. When we did as we were told, they shoved us out of the van and drove off._

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><p>"Santana! Baby come on wake up." I jolt awake but I continued shaking violently and crying hard. I sudden burst of nausea came over me causing me run to the waste basket gagging but nothing coming out. "Are you alright? Do I need to call Quinn?" she said sitting up looking like she was about to try to come over to me.<p>

"Nah I think I'll be ok, just hold me." I say crawling back into bed not wanting her to move. Brittany has me lay down on her chest gently so not to hurt her bruises.

"This one was really bad huh." She said still rubbing my back.

"It was probably one of the worst one I ever had. It was so graphic. They were complete strangers who raped us both repeatedly. I still feel the stinging from where he hit me." I say rubbing her thigh above her cast. I was still crying but not quite as hard.

"It's ok, your safe here." She said rubbing small circles on my back. "I wish I could chase all your demons away."

"I wish I chase yours too. I'm supposed to be taking care of you and here I am bawling on you again." I say feeling bad that she was in such rough shape and here I was crying on her. It felt so selfish but I needed her, more than I needed anything else.

"One step at a time, babe" she says and then starts singing to me again. I sing with her and fall into a dreamless sleep.

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Review!


	22. Lady Babies

=Brittany=

It didn't take me long to hate this chair. I couldn't do anything for myself not even go to the fucking bathroom. Santana had become my nurse which I felt terrible about, but if I had to choose it'll be her, not that she would listen if I said no. She had been watching me really closely, more than normal. I know why, she thinks I'm going to hurt myself. She and I both know why I was on that roof. It scares her, more than those nightmares do. I'm not depressed; I'm just afraid I will become what those voices are telling me to become.

I have a whole new respect for Artie. He is going to be in the chair for the rest of his life not unless some miracle cure comes along. I'm only in it for a few months. "It's not that bad once you get used to it." He tells me cautiously looking over at Santana talking to Mr. Schue.

"Don't worry I won't let her kill you. Just watch your hands. So how long did it take you to adjust to people doing everything for you."

"About a year after being out of the hospital. Some things got better some things I learned to do myself, and after some proving to my parents they let me. I know how hard this is for you." I didn't want to say he didn't, that I have been dancing since before I could walk. Now I had to have help just changing chairs. "I know your a dancer, you'll dance again; I played baseball again."

"That's the one where you hit a ball with a bat and run around the bases right?" I ask feeling a bit stupid but everyone in glee knew better than to call me it. Last time it was Finn and she popped him in the back of the head before I could even register it.

"Yeah, I was obsessed with the sport before my accident after some searching my mom found a baseball team for kids in wheel-chairs. It was weird at first playing with kids half my age and 5 or so years older than me. It wasn't as competitive but it was still baseball. You will be out of that cast and at the level you were before, maybe better, in a year." I suddenly feel guilty. He was right I would dance again.

"I'm sorry." I say feeling really bad for him I could not imagine not dancing or doing gymnastics again.

"Don't be, it's why I'm here, well not just because I'm in a wheelchair but because I let it make me jaded and depressed. You have a lot more to overcome than just the chair. You both do." He said nodding to Santana who had walked up to us. "I'm going home next month, still going to therapy but can't let me being in a chair the rest of my life define the rest of my life.

"Well as touching as this has..." I shoot her the look that shuts her up every time. "I was just going to say that we need to head out if you don't want to be stuck outside. Thanks for taking care of my girl, Artie, but we need to go." I blush at the 'my girl' part. I love it when she calls me that especially with other people around. After the Puck incident, she's been more open about our relationship, at least within the glee club. She even accepted Puck's apology. She trusts most of the glee guys, at least enough to sit and talk with them, without giving them mean glares and having her very thick guards up. She was getting better even if her nightmares weren't.

"So Mr. Schuster how are you and Ms. P going?" I ask as we were heading toward our ward. Santana looked up to wanting to know too.

"I'm thinking about asking her to move in with me. She is only still here because the doctors don't want her living alone and passing out from cleaning fumes. I just don't know how to ask her."

"Just go ahead and do it." Santana says. "Listen, everyone knows you're crazy about each other, no pun intended." She added when I started snickering.

"Is she still going to be around when we need her?" I ask.

"Of course if we aren't here call us and we can be here in twenty minutes. I'm going need you to wrap your arms around my neck." I do what he asks and Santana steadies my leg and Mike and Blaine quickly carry my chair up the stairs and opens the door for us.

"Goodnight girls" Blaine says waving goodbye. We mumble our thank-yous before heading to our room to wrap my leg for the shower.

"I'm proud of you." I say as she pushed me toward our bathroom. "I know how hard it is for you to let the guys carry me up."

"Well only eight guys can even be near you without me feeling nervous, and two of them are almost girls. I still don't trust Puck enough to do this."

"I'm still proud of you." I say helping her pull the trash bag over my leg. "After this we need to do our exercises. I need to move my toes and rotate my ankles and we need to do the exercises Lawson gave you for your nightmares."

She groans, "Those don't work I surround myself with happy things and I just dream of something in the future that starts out good but all goes to hell, that is what happened last night. It starts out good and happy, then some asshole attacks us or you kill yourself. I have had both over and over, every other time I do those exercises." I hear her frustration as she helps me to the shower chair. We get clean quickly not having much conversation. "I love you Britt, I just don't feel like they help."

"Well lets try again tonight and if you still have them we can talk to Lawson in the morning. Maybe there's another way to soften them." I say trying to stay positive. She seemed more down than I was, and I had no idea how to help her.

She get me situated with pillows and making sure my leg was propped up and secure before she crawled in beside me and draped herself over me.

"I'll protect you from your night demons." I say rubbing small circles on her back. "Do you want me to sing to you." She gives a small nod and I start singing, nothing in particular just babbling to song. As soon as her breathing stabilized, I started to nod off. I had adapted to Santana's sleeping habits if she was in distress I will wake up easily it didn't take much to wake me up. I was a pretty deep sleeper before she became my roommate. Then I had a full fledged night-terror and got clawed across the face. After a few of those, I started waking up easier and easier. Now all that was needed for me to wake up was a twitch, it why we finally just decided to start in the same bed.

I don't know how long I was asleep or if I was even asleep, but I wake up to her hands tightening around me hurting the bruises on my ribs. I start rubbing her back. When she started whimpering I shook her. "Baby come on wake up, your having a bad dream. Sanny, come on wake up." she wasn't waking up.

"Don't do it. Baby we can fix you." I continue to shake her. She finally looked up at me, "Thank you..." she mumbled before laying back down on my boobs.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I ask, knowing the answer but doing what our therapist said.

"I keep dreaming that you kill yourself because the voices keep telling you to hurt the ones you love." She said. "Please, next time you get a urge to throw yourself off a building talk to me first, so I can go with you. I can't live without you. I need you Britt."

"I will. I don't want to let them control me, the others talked me down that day then the branch broke."

"I love you hon, I just worry about you hurting yourself because of your fear of hurting me."

"I can't wait till we get out of here and have a family." I say, then she got very quiet.

"I never told you, that because I was so young when I was raped, there was so much damage done that I can't have children, but I'll love for you to have babies that I can call ours."

"Do you have any family members that can be donors." I ask, "If you do they could come out looking like ours, It'll be so awesome if I could carry your babies."

She smiles at me, rubbing small circles on my stomach, "I have a cousin that looks a lot like me, and I like him enough to ask, that and he's on my mother's side so he and the bastard who did this to me share no blood."

"I can't wait to have your lady babies, they'll be perfect. Try to get back to sleep baby. I'm not going anywhere." And I sing her back to sleep hoping it'll be the last time that night, but tonight I wasn't so lucky. As soon as I dozed off it seemed like I'm awoken by the trembling and whimpering of my girlfriend. "Sanny, baby wake up" her grip tightens around me once again causing me to whimper from the pressure on my bruised torso. I move her grip so it's just around my shirt. "Santana." I shake her lightly. She wasn't waking so I shook her harder, which only made her whimper more and hold on tighter gripping my sides again. I struggle reaching for my cell phone. She wasn't waking up. I couldn't do this alone, "Rachel? I need you and Quinn to come help me."

Within minutes there was a knock on the door, and Rachel and Quinn came in. Rachel in that ridiculous nightgown and Quinn in a tank-top and underwear. Between the two of them they remove her from me only for her to start thrashing and screaming "Santana!" Quinn shouted holding her still. She then collapses onto the floor sobbing loudly. I couldn't tell what she was saying. "Come on S. Let's get you back to bed." Quinn said helping her up and sitting her down next to me where she draped herself over me again but only griped my shirt. She was still crying and shaking but she was awake.

"Do you want us to stay with you." Rachel asked. I shake my head knowing she wouldn't want to talk about her nightmare with them there.

"Call us if you need anything. We don't mind." I simply nod and wave for them to go on.

Santana was still shaking and sobbing into my shirt. "Do you want to talk about it." she shakes her head and pulls me in closer. I continue rubbing her back waiting for her to stop crying and trembling. "San, you need to talk about it. "I know you don't want to but you need to." she shakes her head again, and continues crying and holding on my shirt tightly carful not to hurt me. "This one is worst than the one last week?" I ask holding her trying to make her feel safe.

"You have no idea." was all I could get out of her. She continued sobbing into my shirt for what seemed like hours and all I could do was rub her back and sing to her. Neither one of us got back to sleep.

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Reviews are amazing they motivate me to update faster, and even help the quality or the chapters because I know what ya'll like and don't like.


	23. Taking the Next Step

=Will=

I was going to do this, today I was going to talk to Emma's doctors to see if she was well enough to move in with me. I'm standing in front of the door, on the plate said Dr. Patricia Lawson. She was the main therapist for the girls, with exception of Tina she had all the glee girls plus Kurt and Blaine. I peek in her window to see if she had anyone right now. I see that she is talking to Rachel, Quinn and two very well dressed men, the more flamboyantly dressed one had his arm around Rachel. I assume these were her dads. I knew they were going to be temporary foster parents to Quinn, because her parents had signed her over to the state to prevent a law suit.

I smile and sit on the bench outside. I knew the two of them were just about ready to leave this place but after Brittany's accident they were hesitant because of Santana's nightmares, and they were one of the select few that could touch her during one of her episodes. Even-though both Brittany and Santana insisted that they not hold back for them, Quinn and Rachel didn't want to leave them.

The door opens and the girls and Berry Dads walk out. Rachel's face lit up, "Abba, Daddy this is Mr. Schuester, he's been running the musical arts program here."

"Thank you for taking care of my baby and her Quinnie, you have no idea how much this helped them. My names Hiram and this is my husband Lerory." I shake both the mens hands. "Let us treat you dinner and we will fill you in." Rachel grabs my hand dragging me with them. I couldn't very well say no to Rachel, not over something like this.

"Girls!" Leroy said looking back at them in the back seat of the SUV. "Let's not make-out when your teacher's in the car." I hold back a snicker as the two girls turned bright red.

They decided on a Italian restaurant called Breadstixs, I have been here before but only because Terri practically demanded me take her. "So, I guess I'm going to be the one to tell you. We are not taking the girls out of school but we are just switching them over to an out-patient program, just one step at a time. You'll still have them in your class they just won't spend every minute on campus."

I smile at my two sort-of graduates, "I'm proud of you girls. You have gotten so much better since we met a few months ago."

"I'm still worried about Brittany and Santana though." Quinn said looking at her lap.

Rachel grabs her leg and gave it a squeeze. "Between the two of them they can take care of themselves Britt is going to be on crutches next week and Santana only has problems at night usually. They will be fine, and Santana trusts Mercedes and Tina enough to let them help. They are about the level we were a few months ago. You worry to much it's going to give you lines." she said the last bit playfully making Quinn giggle, and her dad's send awing looks. They were cute, I had to admit that.

"So your going to be my sister AND my girlfriend." Quinn says though giggles sending Rachel into the same giddy mood. We all made small talk for awhile before they dropped me off. Then I went back to what I was going to do before.

I'm standing in front of her office again willing myself to knock and go in while she isn't helping any of the kids. I then bring myself to knock on the door.

=Santana=

I sit in the hospital room with Brittany and her Dad. She's sitting up on the table/cot. I'm holding her hand though I'm not sure if I'm holding it for her comfort or mine. She had just got out of X-ray and the doctor was looking them over or something. There's a small knock on the door before he came in. I didn't know how hard I was squeezing her hand until she said 'ow'. I instantly loosen my grip. 'This man is here to help her. You can't do everything.' I think knowing logically that I could trust him that Mr. Pierce and I wouldn't let him hurt her, even if he would, but logic and my anxiety aren't friends.

"I seems that her leg is healing nicely, her ribs are healing good too. Ok Brittany I want you to try to put weight on that ankle, no keep the brace on" he said handing her crutches that are already adjusted to her height. She stood up putting 90% of her weight on the crutches. She stood for a while it looked painful. Then her ankle rolled and the doctor and I caught her. "Alrighty then, we probably need to keep using the chair but I want you to try to walk on it everyday. Your her roommate right?" he asked me I just nod and helped Brittany back on the table. "So you can make sure she tries to walk on it though-out this next week." I nod again not feeling very sociable. "You're doing a great job taking care of her. Keep it up. See you guys in a week, and remember to keep trying to walk on it, but if it hurts don't push yourself, just do your regular exercises." We headed out with our escort back to the campus. Mr. Pierce carried his daughter and the escort handled the chair.

"Bye baby girl we love you. Call us tomorrow Ok" Mr. Pierce bent down and kissed his daughter goodbye. "Can I have a hug?" he asked me I smile and hug him. There are two men I can hug that are not my father, I call that progress.

I start to push her toward Lawson's office for our therapy. They have given up on trying to talk to us individually, mainly because I refuse to let Britt out of my sight.

"So Santana how have your nightmares been." neither of us answer, I couldn't even put into words just how bad my nightmares have been. I haven't even told Britt about the one the other night even when she pressed. I wanted to forget about it.

"I've had some of the worst of the worse this past few weeks and I don't want to relive them." I say not wanting to go to far into it. It was the worst nightmare/flashback I have ever had, no doubt about it. Gritty, gory, horror it was like a combination of all the really bad ones I've had since the incident in the mens ward. I did not want to talk about it and yet everyone was pressuring me. "Is there any way other than those useless exercises to make them stop." Brittany squeezes my hand to strengthen me.

"We can see if a light sedative, in combination of your anxiety medication will help. I still think you should still do the exercises." I roll my eyes. "Only a combination of all of these and therapy are going to be the best bet of getting them to stop. I think they have been worst lately because of what has happened the last few months." I had to agree, the exercises before the thing at the mens ward had helped and my nightmares were mainly flashbacks and didn't bring Brittany into the mix, at least not as often as the ones that plague me now. I had only about one a week that was graphic enough to leave me shaken. Now I had them up to three times a night.

She paused a minute before turning to Brittany. "How has your meds been working."

"Usually, I have only been hearing Tubs and Goat. The others have maybe shown up once or twice when I'm not feeling good but they have been leaving me alone for the most part."

"That's good to hear, Ok Santana. I think after supper we should meet up to run though the exercises maybe it'll help." I agreed if only to get her to shut up. Afterward, we went though our nightly routine. I got her in the shower and we did her exercises.

Tonight was the last night Rachel and Quinn would be staying in the ward; I'm happy for them I just not as close to Tina and Mercedes but they were better than the nurses.

I love taking care of Brittany. I'm going to start studying really hard, so I can get a great job to buy her anything and everything she wants. I try to rid my mind of all things negative in hopes of having a nightmare-less night. For once these 'exercises' didn't fail me, and I had one of the best dreams I had ever had, even if I felt it would go sour at any moment.

"_Goodmorning darling" Brittany says reach over me. I smile and roll over to kiss her. She was looking beautiful six months pregnant with our second child._

"_Good morning babe. Good morning Lucas." I say to her belly. We lay in bed lazily kissing each other._

"_Mommy, Mami?" our little girl comes in holding her unicorn. Her sandy blond hair was a mess and her brown eyes were filled with sleep. _

"_What is it nina." I say, rolling off of my wife. _

"_I know the little hand isn't on the 8 yet but I can't go back to sleep can I lay in here with you?" I smile and pat between the two of us letting our four year old snuggle in between us. Brittany mouths that I'm whipped, and I stick my tongue out. I knew I was, and I wasn't going to deny it. Lucy and Brittany had me wrapped around their fingers and I couldn't tell them no when ever they gave me that look. _

_The rest of the day was filled with a picnic, chasing each other at the park and talking to Brittany's belly. Nothing was wrong the worst thing that happened is Lucy skinned her knee. It was the perfect day. _

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><p>Review please<em>.<br>_


	24. The Worst of the Worse

**WARNING: This is the worse nightmare yet, and probably will be the worse one period. triggers include torcher, rape, kidnapping, and murder. Very Very strong M. Since the bulk of this is the nightmare I'm not going to italicize it but boader it with ooooooooo  
><strong>

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><p>=Santana=<p>

It seemed like Rachel and Quinn leaving started a trend of the glee kids switching to out patient program. By February, the only kids that were still boarding here were, Mercedes, Puckerman, Sam, Brittany and I. It only made me feel more like a freak. Sam and Mercedes were probably going to go next. Puck and I were here because of the state, so we couldn't leave even if our parents tried to pull us out. It was depressing.

I listen to the sound of Brittnay's steady breathing and listen to her mumble about magical unicorns. I couldn't sleep and certainly didn't want to. The exercises help some I'll give them that, but when I do have a nightmare, they are so much worse. Brittany didn't want to go to sleep, but she fell asleep shortly after laying down with me. I know I should be sleeping but I didn't want to relive the kind of nightmare I been having especially one like the one I had last night.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooo

"So I was wondering if I could stay over at your house this weekend. My parents are going out of town and I don't want to be home alone. Wait a sec can you stay over at my house. We can tell your uncle that they'll be there." the pretty blond closed her locker. We have been close friends since freshman year but I managed to keep my home life a secret from the naive blond.

"I don't think my uncle will let either; you see I kinda got in trouble earlier this week so he's not going to let me have anyone over or go anywhere." I lied. He wouldn't let me come over especially on a weekend, and there was no way I would bring Brittany over to my house.

"Don't be silly Tana of course she can come over. I'll invite a few friends too." no this was not happening. I shut my locker and see him, looking as innocent as ever. I see the darkness behind his facade, he planned on having his asshole friends over like he always did on Fridays and pass me around like a serving dish. If Brittany stayed over, the same thing would happen to her.

"Give us a bit to finish up over here and we'll be home soon." I say starting to plan a way to get us out of this. I'm going to have to shatter Brittany's innocent bubble something I hoped I never had to do.

"Alrighty I'll see you then." he said with a venom that only I could trace. After he was out of sight, I pulled Brittany into the teachers bathroom locking the door.

"San what's going on?" she asked. Gosh this was hard. "San?" I collapse and started crying. She hugs me but I still can't calm down enough to tell her. "Santana, what's wrong."

"You can't, I can't let them hurt you." I stutter out.

"Who San?" her blue eyes grew, "Is your uncle hurting you?" she asked suddenly realising all the signs. Why I wouldn't join the Cheerios with her or wear anything that didn't go to at least to my knees. I just let out a sob. I was going to have to show her. I unbuttoned my jeans and slid them down to reveal the dark bruising on my hips and inner thighs. She wrapped me into her arms. "We got to tell someone San. You can't let him hurt you anymore. How long has this been going on." I don't answer her I just sit and cry in her lap. My parents died in a car accident with my baby sister apparently the break-line was cut. My uncle got full custody but he was hurting me before that. Since I started school, he's been hurting me. She picks me up "Come on lets go to the police."

I just nod wanting so badly to get out of that house. We were barely sophomores so we were just going to walk the few blocks to the downtown police station. By the time I saw his van it was too late. Two of his friends quickly hopped out and grabbed us both. I start screaming for them to let her go, not sure if I was speaking English or Spanish. It earns me a hard hit across the face. I continue fighting them trying to keep them away from Brittany. They knock me off hitting my head on something, stunning me.

"Wow, why didn't you tell us Tana was into girls. Blondie sure does have some legs. Wow she's a fighter." I hear her scream and one of them hit her then the darkness takes my ears too.

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Brittany. She was my first thought as I wake up on the floor of the basement. Brittany! I sit up to look for her. I've been stripped down to just my panties. I couldn't see her though. It was too bright, and I was too weak to stand up. How long have I been out? As my eyes adjusted to the light I see blond hair. I couldn't really see her though. I try to move but vertigo takes me before I could stand. The men surrounded her, "assholes" I shout if only to turn their attention to me. Two of Carlos' friends come over to me.

"We got this Carlos." one says. "Good to see your awake. I've already had Blondie tonight so I'm going to try you again." I hear Brittany whimper in the background still not able to get a good look at her. One of the guys removed the remainder of my clothes before shoving three fingers roughly into me. I bite my lip at the intrusion, still more worried about my friend who probably has just had her virginity stolen from her.

"You shithead." I curse at him before an erection is shoved at my face. I seal my lips knowing it was pointless to fight them. He plugs my nose until I am forced to open my mouth and take a breath. I focus on helping Brittany not participating in what was happening to me; This was a weekly ordeal for me. I hear her struggling but I still can't get a good look at her. I notice dried blood in her once shiny blond hair. I notice that she is nude. I hear her cries. Then everything goes silent for awhile the guys finish with me and leave the basement locking the door behind them.

I crawl over to her and hold her not caring that neither of us are dressed. I see blood, lots of it, some dripping from her opening more from the gash on her head. "I'm so sorry." I cry. She tells me not to blame myself but I do.

"San? Are we going to die? I'm ccold" I shush her smoothing the matting hair behind her. I didn't know what to tell her. I started looking for our clothes but only find that they are shredded. I look at the clock to find that it's 12 though I'm not sure if it's noon or midnight or what day it is. I just held her until they came back.

I'm yanked from behind by the hair, causing Brittany to fall from my lap and clunk her head on the cement. I struggle against them as one of the men works me into his lap. Placing me on him with my arms pinned against my back breaking one of them. I struggle but he was one of the strongest. I then watch as my uncle and two of his friends rape Brittany again purposely making me watch. I try to wiggle out of his grip but was feeling very weak from not eating since breakfast Friday.

The one holding me had tied my arms and now was only holding me with one hand and putting his cigarettes out on my shoulders with the other. He was also making small cuts on my back too, and putting his thumbs in them. This went on for about an hour before they switched off. It was slow torcher hearing her beg for them to stop and scream at every burn and cut the guy gave her. Three hours later they leave us again. This time I couldn't move but she seemed to have found the strength. "Britt, go hide somewhere. I can take care of myself" I say with as much assurance as I could.

"No, I'm not leaving you down here. That and I don't think we can hide anywhere unless we can fit in the washer and dryer. I want to do this before it's too late." she bent down and kissed me so gently right before I lost consciousness.

I wake up to her screams again this time they were shocking her with something. I try to get up but only start violently coughing, I look down at my hands to see blood. It made me a little queasy but I get up any way. I get over to them but he they shock me with the wires they were shocking her with, knocking me down again. I keep trying to get up to help her but every-time I'm punched in the stomach or hit with whatever they where currently doing to her. It was getting quiet, and I was only hearing her whimper occasionally. She was coughing up blood now too. Then my uncle dealt the final blow before turning to me holding a bat "Goodbye darling"

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I wake up gasping in Brittany's arms, back in the mental hospital. She was safe, my uncle was dead, I was safe. But that didn't stop me from crying for hours, and refusing to eat. I finally agreed to eat something today when Brittany went on a hunger strike too. I told her some but not how graphic it was. How I could still feel the burns on my shoulders or hear her screaming. I don't plan on sleeping again any time soon. I haven't talked to anyone but Brittany even though she called Mr. Schue and Ms. P to talk to me and had Lawson come by too. No one needed to know about my demons especially when most of them are dead. I recognized two of the 'friends' because one of them he did share me with, the other made the news a few years back. Both of who were killed in prison, by the prisoners for being 'baby rapers'. I mean how could they fight my fucking Freddy Kruger. Shit, now I'm going to have a nightmare about Freddy and my uncle teaming up.

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><p>AN: I'm working on bringing this to a close but have kind of backed myself into a corner. Reviews are appreciated and needed.<p> 


	25. Brittany vs Nightmares

AN: In the last few chapters I've written while watch either crime tv, 1000 ways to die and 80's horror movies(sleepaway camp, Nightmare on Elm(1-7), Friday the 13th (1-10) ect). I watch too much of this shit, you might can tell. Right now I'm watching NoE 3.

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=Brittany=

She looked terrible and there was nothing I could do to help her. She didn't want to talk about it, she barley would eat, and when she did she usually threw it up. She wouldn't sleep. I couldn't get her to tell me anything about the nightmare that sent her in this tailspin just that it was the worse she ever had. She wouldn't talk to any of the adults she trusted. She wouldn't even talk to her sister or parents. I told them what I knew, that she had a really graphic nightmare involving me and her uncle, and since then she has been like this and she wrote that breaking the led five times.

'Your wasting your time; she's helpless you know.' Cricket said. I did my best not to listen. 'If you keep obsessing over this damaged girl your _never_ going to get out of here. Don't make me get _Him_.' I start to braid her hair into fine strands just out of boardom trying to keep from acknowledging him.

'Don't listen to him baby-doll' Tubs says to me. I smile at him over on Santana's vacant bed that hasn't been slept in since I was in the hospital almost 4 months ago.

"But how can I help her she has never been this bad before." I say. "Goat do you know anything?" . He was like her subconscious talking to me whenever she was unavailable but this was different she wasn't in isolation or in a different class. I wasn't asleep or somewhere else. She was just really traumatized by whatever nightmare

'I only know that she's scared. Keep singing to her, she'll come around to you before any of them.'

I have been singing to her for the last few hours my throat was getting sore and she was still sobbing on my chest. I would take her to our therapist if I could carry her. I wasn't in the chair any more but I certainly wouldn't be able to carry her. The last time I called them over she didn't talk or even look at them.

Quinn and Rachel even threatened to move back in. I told them that it would do no good that I couldn't even get her to talk how did they expect to. I said it a bit meaner than I meant but I was frustrated that everyone thought they knew more than me. Her parents and the doctors I could accept but not the other glee kids. They had no idea how severe this was in comparison to the others. She would only move to follow me to the bathroom. I knew it was to make sure no ghosts grabbed me in the halls. I didn't bother going to the lunch room because she would feel pressured to talk about it and being around that many people when she was so shaken was not a good idea.

"I'm so tired B, but I'm afraid to sleep." she said for the first time in three days. Her voice was hoarse and raspy. I hand her a bottle of water and rub her back whispering comforting things to her. "I think I'm ready to talk about it." she said sitting up. "I mean it's probably the only way to get out of this place right?" I nod for her to go on. She tells me about a world that she lived with her uncle and we went to a normal high school. How she kept what he was doing to her a secret to protect me. When I started asking questions about her staying at my house or me going to hers, she gave some excuse but was trumped when he over heard her. She told me he was hurting her. We were going to the police, and they grabbed us.

I sat and waited for her to finish the gruesome tale ending in my murder and almost hers. If the theory that if you die in your sleep you never woke up was true, than I woke her up just in time. I remember how hard it was to get her up.

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The first twitch woke me up. When her twitching turned into sobs, I shook her trying to wake her up. She didn't start thrashing but curled into a fetal position. I kept shaking her she screamed a few times but I still couldn't get her to wake up. She hit me a few times but not hard enough to hurt. She fell to the floor trying to avoid my touch knocking over my crutches in the progress.

Tina and Cedes were staring at us, obviously scared by the intensity of her nightmare. They have seen her freak out before, but must they stare. I was just getting annoyed at all my friends. Finally I dumped the rest of the water bottle by our bed on her. She sat up looking terrified for a moment and then through her arms around me soaking my shirt. I waved the on lookers on. They apologized the next day when they saw just how bad of shape she was in. "It's alright I really just need to be alone with her. We'll be back in glee club when she's better." And since then I just held her.

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I had a few of the adults talk to her. They were older, they knew more about her history, they knew what they were doing. I love everyone in the glee club but I can't take their advice when they don't know why she is the way she is. The girls know she was molested as a child. They don't know that she has nightmares about not being able to protect me, well Rachel and Quinn do to some extent. They don't know that two other men have hurt her in the same way as the main one and that is why she can't trust men half of the time.

People don't get her nightmares. Sure, they are sympathetic but they cannot understand how a dead man can haunt her so badly for so long after. Lawson put it to me best, 'When someone is traumatized so young or exposed to such violence it becomes engraved in the persons brain. Her uncle is just a face to that fear. It's her boogeyman' It made perfect since to me even before I asked Dr. Lawson. I didn't get why others couldn't understand it. "Do you feel better" I ask continuing to rub her back. She gives me the smallest of nods.

"I know you've been singing to me for the last few hours but can you keep doing it so I can know your alright." I start singing about ponies and rainbows, anything that would be hard to turn into something evil. I certainly wasn't going to sleep deep enough for her to have another nightmare. I have been refusing to take my sedatives. Lawson knows so it's not like it's wrong, I wasn't going to leave her alone. I still feel bad for the other night when I passed out on her. She acted like she didn't care but that didn't stop me from feeling bad. "Britt?"

"Yeah?" I answer still braiding her hair, but not tying them off.

"Which of the voices were bothing you?"

"Just cricket. The others are on your side."

"So he hasn't came back."

"Not since the one two weeks ago." I say recalling him trying to get me to hurt her again. After falling out of the tree, I told Santana and Lawson everything to keep from repeating the same mistakes. Well from letting them drive me off the roof top. "Glad your feeling better. Are you hungry?" she shakes her head. I let it go; I was just happy she was making progress, but tomorrow she's going to eat, I have my ways. If she refused to eat, I would refuse to eat. Call it underhanded but it was the sure way to make her eat.

"Do I have to tell Lawson about it tomorrow." She asked twirling one of the braids making it de-braid.

"Not tomorrow but if you want me to tell her about it I will. You've been a zombie for three days, she knows this was more than just a flashback."

"I just never have had one that graphic. Not one that felt that real." She pulled off her shirt. "Are there burns or cuts on my back." I check knowing she was serious.

I rub the caramale skin checking all over. Then I try to make her laugh, "Nope only that cute little birth mark that reminds me of a lizard." She snickers and I feel her blushing she hated that birthmark but I thought it was cute.

"I still feel them though."

"I know you do."

"I think I'm going to need your help telling her. I know talking is the only way to get out of here and keep it from becoming more than a bad dream."

"I'm here if you need me. Try to get some sleep." I shut off the lamp and start to sing to her again hoping she'll be able to sleep.

**AN: another chapter done. I didn't get any reviews last time :( which was a bit discouraging. I'm going to start the next chapter but don't know when it's going to be up. Sorry I had so much difficulty with this chapter.**


	26. Brittany Babble

**AN: Between the X's is a flashback. But don't worry this one is mostly positive. I'm trying to get it to be lighter from here on out but I can't promise anything. As for the proofing I have been working on that. I have always sucked at spelling and grammar but I love to write and have been doing it since 99' but I have only been writing on the computer(not counting essays) since 09'. Before that it was all handwritten sometimes in pencil sometimes in rainbow pens. I have a big stack of composition notebooks filled with random fanfictions I wrote when I was board in class starting in 5th grade. I've been working on rereading them before posting for awhile now but sometimes I don't catch them until much later, if I catch them at all. Glad Y'all have been enjoying my story and thank you for the reviews, keep it up! Here's the next chapter. **

=Santana=

It didn't take long for me to fall asleep, not sleeping for three nights can do that to a person. I don't know if Britt slept or not she was sitting up singing about unicorns and rainbows, a little off key from doing that almost non stop for the last few days. I didn't mind Brittany-babble it is one of the many things I love about her. Just how happy she is usually. Her babbling in singsong was so comforting, or just her babbling about what Goat and Tubs are saying. I love her and she's mine. She sometimes forgets I can't hear or see them though. I remember when I first came in.

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My caseworker's female assistant was brought on the scene after I tried to seduce him. She was driving me to the LIMH property the teen ward looked more like a summer camp. In fact, they told me when I first I'd be coming here to think of it like a summer camp. They said I wasn't going to be with the crazies but other kids who needed special emotional and mental care. I was just happy they weren't sending me to prison. "Ok Santana, your going to have a roommate. I want you to be nice to her if you try to fight her your likely going to end up in the quiet room."

"I'll leave her alone if she leaves me alone." I say hoping I don't get someone I couldn't stand: a racist, a prude, someone who doesn't bathe. You get the picture.

"I'm serious Santana, I don't know much about her but I know she's pretty sensitive and often talks to herself. She acts a lot younger than she is."

"I'll be nice unless she pisses me off." She just shook her head giving up on trying to tell me to be nice.

She showed me the lunchroom the building where the classes. Apparently you don't go from class to class but the teachers do. All teens were in the same class but different grades I was confused but I would rather move at my own pace. I was really advance in English but hated history and mixed up the dates and terms. She pointed out the boy's rooms and told me the coed hours. Finally we made it to the girls' dorm where the bathroom and showers were. It looked kinda like a nursing home outside the rooms mirrors on the ceiling, a nurse's desk and a tv area that a few girls plus a very gay boy were watching Project Runaway. "Are one of them my roommate?" I asked trying to figure out who she was.

"Nope but here's your room. Remember."

"Yeah yeah I'll be nice." I say she helped me carry my extra suit case into a room.

There was a leggy blond with big blue eyes hopped up and though her arms around me. I didn't hug her back but I didn't shove her off either. Her touch felt good and she was very pretty. I wanted to hug her back but I have only been with her for five seconds, "You brought me my roommate. Hi I'm Brittany." she said a little too perky for my taste.

"Santana." I say with a handshake.

"Alright I'll be leaving you girls to get to know one another than she threw my bag on to the vacant bed that had my bedspread from home on it, which made the room feel more like mine.

"Oh no! Lord Tubbington." she cried picking up my bag to move it over. "Are you Ok baby." She said picking up something invisible. I must have been giving her a WTF look. "Oh Santana this is Lord Tubbington he's my cat. Do you want to pet him?" I wasn't sure what to say. If I should ask what cat, or go with it.

"I can't see him." I say with a lot of uncertainly. I didn't want to hurt her feelings it'll feel like pushing a little kid in the mud, but I can't pet an imaginary cat. Her face drops to a frown and the most adorable pout. "Ok he's right here right?" she starts giggling.

"That's his tail silly." I smile at her wondering why everything felt so natural with her before we really talked. "It's ok I forget that it's all in my head just like my other friends, it's just hard when I see and hear them all the time, even at times I don't want to."

"So you hear voices." she just nods still very happy.

"I've always heard them. Though my medication has made the meaner ones go away. I don't want some to go though. Why are you here? Did you try to hurt yourself like Quinnie?" she said grabbing my arms examining them.

"No I'm not a cutter, I'm here because it's better then juviee." I didn't know why I was here it couldn't have been just because I tried to seduce my case worker and most of my male teachers. "I guess I'm here because I have a short temper. How long have you been here?"

"Almost three years. My last roommate was suicidal but she got better and went home a few weeks ago."

I couldn't figure out why I was drawn to this girl. She was so innocent and beautiful, which really made me question my sexuality. We made small talk for the first week. I went to therapy daily and they started stirring up my shit bringing my demons to the surface.

"Santana, you need to talk about your feelings about what was done to you. If you don't, you'll just keep lashing out at the ones you care about. What are the first three words that come to mind when you think about him?"

"Asshole, used, and fear." I didn't want to talk about him but she insists I learned a lot about myself that first week. I learned that I only slept with people because I think I'm worthless and am not allowed to say no. It was something that never thought about until she brought it up. Why did I sleep with all these people even when I hated it. I guess over the years my uncle was babysitting me he had on some level brainwashed me.

I had my first nightmare two weeks into the program. He was going to hurt Sebina and I started fighting him. I wake up to Brittany holding me. I see claw marks on her face knowing I did it. "Oh my God, I am so sorry Britt." she hugs me and whispers that it was Ok rubbing my back. I fall into the embrace.

"What were you dreaming?" she asked releasing me from the embrace. I wrap my arms tighter around her. She holds me a little longer.

"Does it hurt?" I ask dabbing the scratches with a tissue.

"Not much. Sit down and talk to me." Brittany was my closest friend here other than Dr. Lawson, but I haven't told her what he did to me. I didn't want her to know about the evil in the world. Brittany was in a bubble filled with rainbows, sunshine, unicorns, kittens and all things sugary. I didn't want to be the person that popped it. "Santana, what's going on. Why are you shaking."

I didn't even know I was shaken, "Do you really want to know? I mean really, it's dark and so awful. I don't want to scare you." I say sitting back down on my bed.

"San. I'm already scared for you. You were just acting like you were scared for your life. I may not be smart but I know when someone is genuinely frightened."

"It was about my uncle. He was trying to hurt my baby sister in the same way he hurt me. I couldn't let him do that." I say being as veg as I could be.

"How did he hurt you?"

"He raped me." I say my voice cracking. I had never said it aloud to anyone but . I saw her gasp and then come sit next to me and hugged me. I crumbled into the embrace and started crying. I never cried on anyone, it was always into my pillow. She didn't say much just whispered that it was alright and that she wasn't going to let any one was going to hurt me. She didn't keep asking me questions but just held me. Something about Brittany made me feel safe. That was the first night she held me till I fell asleep.

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"Good morning hon." I say rolling over to kiss her.

"Goo Mornin" she mumbles half asleep. I continue to kiss her: her lips, neck, cheek. "I could get used to waking up like this." she says rolling over so she's hovering above me. We start to kiss more heavily tongues lazily playing tag. I slip my hand under her top and start slowly circling her nipple. She breaks the kiss to give a light moan. Then she started kissing my neck lingering on my pulse. She then sled down so that she was eye level with my shorts, planting small kisses as she trailed down. She continued kissing my inner thighs before sliding my shorts and underwear down. I laced my fingers through her tangled blond mane, waiting for her to make the next move. My knees were shaking with want. She gently held my hips as she kissed closer to my center. She kissed my clit once before diving in to me with her tongue. It was perfect in every way. At one point I could be intimate with anyone, but only with Brittany will I be intimate with now. She is my savior in so many ways. She taught me how to care for myself again, with the help of Lawson but it was mainly Brittany that will keep me taking care of myself

After I finished her we just cuddled, "Do you feel like going to class today?" she asked combing my hair as I listened to her heart beat.

"We can go tomorrow I say we just lay around to day and have sweet lady kisses." I say sitting up to kiss her.

"Sounds good to me." she says kissing me back. I cuddle into her and go back to sleep to my favorite lullaby, Brittany babble.

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**AN: Reviews make me happy. I think I caught all the spelling errors, My 2yr old Godson was distracting me during proofing so there may have been one that slip on me. **


	27. Reflections

**AN: Sorry this update took so long. Easter and writers block ****are what kept me so long, but here it is and hope to be quicker with the next chapter. Don't forget to review :)**

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><p>=Brittany=<p>

"Do I have to, can't we just stay here and cuddle just one more day." I knew she was nervous about the glee club wanting her to talk about it but I was smart and sent a text to the club and Ms. P included, not to pester her to talk about why she's been in hiding the last few days. They didn't need to know more than they already did. Just like they didn't need to know the main reason why I was on that roof.

"Nope you gotta go to class or you'll get too far behind, and I'm not smart enough to tutor you. I also need someone to cheat off of. Come on." I give her my best pout and she cracks a smile.

"Okay, you got me. That cast comes off next week and then the nurses won't let us shower together anymore. I say we take 2 showers a day until then." she gives me a smirk and we head to start our day. "Britt if they start to bug me about why I've been hiding the last few days can we come back here?"

"If they bother you, I will kick their butts and then we can come back here and cuddle all you want." I say hoping I don't regret saying this. Sure the glee kids stared but they looked away when I shot them a look that said they better act normal.

I was still a bit jealous of them being able to go home and sleep in their own bed tonight. Santana and I weren't 'well' enough to stay at home, I still had days of covering my ears and muttering for them to shut up. She still had nightmares that would scare anyone into hiding for days. I understood it, I just wanted to have what they had. I wanted to go home. I was homesick even if I didn't show it. It's a weird feeling knowing when I come home I'll be coming home to the room of a twelve year old. Yes, I'm still a bit childish at times but when I left there I never did anything but kiss and that was a boy on the playground and that was on the cheek. I didn't know just how evil people could be. I wasn't so sheltered to think that their weren't bad people out there. I just never thought it would happen to someone I knew and loved. I didn't know just how bad people could be. I was a lot different than the twelve year old I was when I was sent here.

The class went well though it turns out my texts and warning glares were effective. They only said that they were happy to see her again. Now that we made it through classes we just needed to get therapy over with. 'She's using you' Cricket says in the back of my mind. He had really been getting to me today. This wasn't about me though, this was about Santana. We didn't need to worry about my issues until she has recovered from her most recent night-terror.

I hop past a window on my crutches. My reflection started talking to me in _His_ voice "You can easily take her right now. It'll be easy smother her tonight. It'll be the quietest that you can do. She won't feel a thing. It'll make her nightmares go away forever. You want that for her don't you."

As the reflection went on it sounded like mine only robotized or something. I don't know how long I was standing on my good foot looking at myself but it wasn't me. It was someone else her smile was different she wasn't on the crutches, the cast was gone and she looked mean. "You better do it, tonight or I will." She sounded mean.

"Brittany, you alright?" Santana looked back at me. She still looked so tired. I look back at my reflection. It was just me again with my crutches and the battered blue cast.

I knew I couldn't lie to her but I had to try. Today was about her, "Yeah just was checking my hair." I knew she saw through it, she gave me a look that said so. "I'll tell you later, right now we need to deal with your problem. Come on." I say hopping along past her.

"Britt, I say we talk about it with Lawson after I do. Your trying to hide this. What did they say to you."

'Stop her! Shut her up now.' The stream of windows had my mirror image yelling at me and chasing me as I tried to ignore her. 'Fine, make me do it." The reflection then picked up a knife that seemed to come out of no where. "Santana!" I throw myself on to her to knock her out of the way. Before grabbing a brick and hurling it at my reflection. Before loosing my balance and slopping to the floor.

"Brittany? What the hell..." I start crying what was going on with me? "Baby, what's going on." she gets closer to me and pulls me into a hug. Part of me wanted to pull away the other part wanted to fall into her comforting embrace. I went with the latter this was all in my head, right?"Come on hun" she said picking up my crutches tucking them under her arms. Then she scooped me up.

"San...you'll hurt yourself." I whine, but she wasn't listening. I try one last thing, kissing her but she kept moving onward. Now I know I will have to tell her and Lawson about my mirror self trying to stab her and me over-reacting by throwing a brick though the classroom window. "At least let me carry my own crutches, they're as tall as you."

We make it to Lawson's and she just gave us a smile and eyeroll. "Do I want to know?"

Santana sat me down on the couch. "Who do you want to start on today. I have been hiding for three days from my worst nightmare ever and Britt just tackled me and then broke a window."

"Santana, your scheduled first. Tell me about your nightmare." She rehashed it all easily without tearing up too bad. I had to hold her hand all the way through which she squeezed the life out of. She was getting better. Considering I had been helping her shower, brush her hair and ditching class for two of those days, also fighting off the nosey people who tried to help but really only annoyed her, holding her hand was easy. "Okay Brittany what's going on with you?"

"That voice I've been hearing has taken over my reflection. She tried to kill Santana." I say it bluntly because if I thought about it I would jumble up my words. It still felt crazy. If there was one thing I hated feeling more than stupid, was feeling crazy. Stupid was something I could change with hours and hours of studying, crazy was something very different. Sure I _was_ crazy but I hated feeling like that. Bringing logic to the hallucinations either made them shut up and go away or proved just how crazy I was. I often wonder if I'll ever get better, I couldn't make them go away. I'll even take giving up Goat and Lord Tubbington if it meant that I wouldn't have to worry about hurting Santana.

"Did she have your scars or the cast?" She asked.

"No, she didn't have the cast. I didn't look close enough to see the scar. Why, does that mean anything?"

"It means it's just a hallucination, it's your fear of hurting her why it took on your reflection. Are you sure it's the same voice that has been talking to you." I nod that was one thing I was sure of. I didn't understand why my cast mattered. "Keep taking your meds and remember that they can't _make_ you do anything."

I nod and get on my crutches before Santana could hop up. "I didn't hurt you did I?"

"Nah, how about that second shower." we giggle and I hop back to our ward with Santana waiting up for me.


	28. Souvenir

=Santana=

I'm sitting in the doctors office with Brittany and her dad. "Is it going to hurt?" Brittany asks looking at the tool he was going to use to get the cast off. It looked dangerous but I knew it wouldn't hurt. He shook his head. "Can I keep the cast. It has all my friends signatures and doodles on it." he said she could; she smiled and clapped like a small child who just got her way.

"Alrighty" he said peeling off the cast. "Lets see how you can stand." She gets up making me and Mr. Pierce nervous. I wanted to help but I knew she wanted to do this herself. She got up no problem and even did a little dance. "Now Brittany, your still healing so no vigorous dancing. I'd prefer you not dance at all for at least a week, Just be careful and don't put too much weight on that leg. And absolutely no climbing or gymnastics or you'll have another cast like that one."

I smile at her spinning around so happy to be up on two feet again. "Are you listening to me?" she stops to nod only to start tugging at me to play with her. How could I say no, this women has me whipped, and I'm happy to have such a beautiful girl to cater to. She twirls me around and I return the gesture. Happy to have to lean up and kiss her again. When Mr. Pierce cleared his throat, I had forgotten her dad and the doctor were still in the room. Our faces flushed and then we went back to listening. He gave further instructions on taking it easy. Britt's dad took the crutches and said something in German that I couldn't understand. Brittany giggled and grabbed my had to meet our escort. "What did he say to you?" I asked elbowing her at the ribs.

"Just a joke about how red our faces were. I suck at translating but that is about it. My Dutch is really rusty."

"I think it's hot."

"Your Spanish is hotter."

I give her a cheesy pick up line in Spanish. She giggles and grabs my hand so we can scurry to catch up to the escort. "See you next week girls, and Ms. Pierce take it easy." She giggles at the formal name and we head to our dorm to drop off the souvenir cast. I didn't ask why she wanted to a reminder of not being able to dance for 5 months, and to be honest I'm glad that she kept it maybe the next time they are getting to her we can talk her out of doing something rash enough to hurt herself again.

She continued dancing around me all the way to Lawson's office. I smiled, "Your making me dizzy." she did a backhand sprang and started jogging really fast but staying with me. "Britt, he said take it easy. I don't think back flips are considered taking it easy."

"It's not that big of a deal San. I just can't help doing this. I haven't done any of this stuff for so long it feels like I just woke up from a long sleep."

"You really scared me you know that. When I saw you that day, I thought it was a lot worst than it was, I thought you were going to die." I say my voice betraying me a bit as I tried not to burst out in tears at the thought of loosing her. She slows down and wraps her arms around me holding me close.

"I love you too. It's OK even with the voices bothering me, I'm not going to do something that stupid again. You don't need to worry." I just hold her tighter. I didn't even know I had started crying until it was complete waterworks but she held me until I calmed down. I didn't want to let her go. She let me go and held out her pinkie. "We have to go to therapy, now." I take the pinkie happily, and tried my hardest not to skip with my heart but when Brittany started skipping that was too much. I was skipping by the time we got to the counseling building.

After counseling, we just went back to our room. I tangle our legs together happy to not feel that scratchy cast but her long creamy legs. They were a little dry from not being lotioned or anything for six months. I was just happy she could wrap them around me. "What's the first thing you want to do when we get out of here?" She asked. I take my mouth off her neck and tried to answer.

"Go bling shopping to find you an amazing ring."

"Wait if we do get married who is going to be the man in the relationship?" She asked still peppering small kisses.

"I don't know, I say we are both the girls. I don't even know if I want a big wedding party maybe just Quinn and Rachel and our families. I think it'll be too complicated otherwise if we include the guys. I don't want to hurt anyones feelings. The club knows that we're closer to them. Not saying I don't want them there but I think two bridesmaids each would be enough. I have my sister and you have your cousins. I figured our baby cousins could be the ring-barer and flower girl as by the time we plan it they'll be five and six, and it would be a perfect time to as Jose about donating his seed for our baby."

"How long have you been planing this?" She asked.

"I have had a lot of time. I did stay up for three solid nights. I also have to rid my mind of all things negative before bed. I think about you all the time."

She grabs my head and kisses me hard on the lips. I deepen the kiss before letting her lay me down. Gosh it was good to have all of her back. It wasn't long before most of our clothes disappeared to random places around the bed. She was so much more graceful with out the chunky cast. By the time we came up for air her bra was undone. My shirt was unbuttoned and we were only in our underwear. We strip down further and snuggle under the blankets completely nude. Our mouths link up again. I was hovering over her loving how our bodies fit so perfectly together. She wraps her legs around me pulling me closer. My hand starts to fondle her chest. After we made love, we just laid on one another, not bothering to put our clothes back on. The warmth from her skin lulled me to sleep.

"_Hey Tana why weren't you at lunch earlier" Julie ran up to me. She was my closest friend(other than my sister) and I use that term loosely. She was the only classmate I haven't pushed away. After my parents found out what happened. They moved us from Columbus to a town called Lima. It was a small town with annoyingly chipper people. It seemed like the perfect place to forget what happened. Most of the kids kept their distance after I beat the shit out of a boy for putting gum in my sisters hair on the school bus. _

"_Don't call me that" I hated that name. He called me that, I knew she didn't know I just hate that name. Every time that name came up I feel his hands all over me, I hear his seductive voice in my ear, making me want to barf. I wanted to forget about that little girl who was Tana. Julie was different. She continued sitting next to me but we never had sleep overs or anything. I didn't tell her what was wrong with me. We sat together at lunch and made small talk, well I gave small talk to her endless ramblings. She was annoying but she was the only one who made me feel normal at school. _

"_Santana! I thought I told you those shorts were too short for gym class." I knew it was coming last week I wore ones that went to my knees and there was something wrong with them, but because I was such and outcast and Julie wasn't in gym with me no one spoke up for me, and who would take the word of a thirteen year old delinquent girl over a seasoned coach. Last year I had him right before lunch and he kept me after nearly every class which was Monday, Wednesday and Fridays. I was an easy target a damaged loner with a history of sexual abuse. He made sure I got the same period this year. After class he pulled me into his office and started kissing me groping my chest and undoing his belt. He finished up as soon as the lunch bell rang telling me I had five minutes to get dressed and brush my hair. He called me Tana too. From the start of sixth grade and all the way to the end of eight grade it was the same drill. I would get in trouble for something as small as the shade of my shorts and he'd keep me after class to fulfill is sexual fantasies if I refused he easily over powered me and just would rape me. It hurt less if I was cooperative. I thought I was the only one he went after until the end of the eight grade were he was arrested for molesting a sixth grade girl in his last period class. After that many others some full grown adults came forward. I wasn't one of them. I didn't want to go through the messy trial. I didn't want to put my family through that again. I had already caused my parents to almost get a divorce. The guy was going to jail for a long time either way one more charge wouldn't make it much longer.  
><em>

I wake up to Brittany gently shaking me from the memory. Lawson showed me a paper last year that said he was killed by fellow prisoner. It was a relief but the memory of him still bothers me. She didn't ask what it was about probably because it wasn't as severe as the others. I think she knows the difference between memories and full out night terrors. I probably never will know how. She just did just like I know how to tell the difference between the voices she hears just by her expression. I'm not complaining, I kiss her thanks and slip back to sleep, forgetting about Julie and Coach Harrison.

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><p>AN: Still working on bringing this to a close don't know how I'm going to do that though. Heres another chapter. Please review. I get all these alerts and favorites but no feedback. Hope the updates will start flowing quicker. Thanks for reading this far.<p> 


	29. Graduation

=Brittany=

_I wait till I hear her faint breathing to know she's asleep. I slide out from under her arm putting a pillow in my place. I start walking though our house. My palms are sweaty. 'Do it, Do it, Do it!' I am holding a pillow. 'Youngest first.' I didn't want to do this it's like I am a puppet for them. I had some will power left but they were stronger. I walk into our 9 month old's room. I'm crying now. I try to scream out but my voice doesn't work. I try to stop myself at the door but he's pushing me forcing me through the door way. He's holding a knife to my back if I stop or show a sign of rebelance, he makes small invisible cuts until I continue. After years of this, I had little power over them. I walk up to his crib he's dressed in a Yankees onesie. I press the pillow over his tan face he looked the most like her. He stilled quickly and then he walks me to the next bed room. Our three year old. She had my pale skin, dark thick hair like hers. Blue eyes like mine. I don't want to but he makes me. I press the pillow over her tiny face she squeals for a minute or two then she is silenced too. Now our oldest our seven year old laying on his belly with his little blond head sticking out of the covers. I roll him over to see her eyes looking back at me I press the pillow to his face crying, he took the longest to go. I wanted to stop but they wouldn't let me. I go back to our bed room I press the pillow over my wife of 9 years face..._

"Brittany, Brittany. Come on Britt-Britt wake up." I sit up and hug her tightly crying into her shoulder. She hushed me like I have done for her time and time again. "You had another dream where you hurt me didn't you." I nod. I couldn't talk about how murdered our children.

"They made me." I manage to get out.

"But Lawson said..."

"What if she's wrong, San. What if I just snap one day and murder our babies."

She continues to hold me, "You saw our babies, what did they look like?" I knew she was trying to get me off the subject of hating myself.

"They were beautiful San. They looked like ours and I killed them. How did they look in your dreams?"

"I only got a good look at them once and she was perfect. You won't hurt them Britt. They haven't bothered you for a very long time. They have finally found a combination of medication that works and the only ones that have turned up at all is Tubs and Goat. Your just nervous because graduation is in a few months. We're going to do fine. You have the tools to make them go away when they rear their ugly head. My parents have gotten us an apartment across from Mr. Schue and Ms. P. My cousin and his room mate lives below it, they'll will keep an eye out for us. Papi has also reserved us both a job. Your going to be an assistant at local dance studio and I'm a secretary for my case worker. We already have our foot in the door. Don't let one bad dream mess that up for us, you wouldn't let me let mine keep me from moving out of here, would you." I shake my head. She was still afraid of the outside world, because so many men have done her wrong. Here she was safe. I had been here nearly 6 years she 3 years. Parts of us didn't want to leave but we wanted our freedom.

"Gosh I love you." I say happy for her little speech.

She pushes my chin up to kiss me. I love you too, now stop crying before I join you." She continues to comfort me until I fall back to sleep all bad thoughts having evaporated from my head.

=Will=

Graduation. Most of my glee clubers have already gone home. Brittany and Santana were the last, mainly because one couldn't do without the other Santana still had graphic nightmares but she didn't lash out anymore and as long as Brittany was there when she woke up she recovered fairly fast.

Now the day has come where all the original members are graduating. It's hard to believe that two years ago I was in an awful marriage in a cubical job that I hated. Now I had a job I loved and gave me purpose. I have a beautiful fiancee who loves the glee club as much as I do, she didn't nag at me it is a equal partnership. Emma is perfect.

Two years ago twelve kids were very damaged and sick. Artie couldn't accept that he'd never walk again and resented the world for it. Blaine still felt guilt for his sexuality. Rachel thought she did something wrong or wasn't good enough when she didn't get her way. Mike woudn't talk to any one more than the normal 'excuse me's' and 'thank yous' and if he did it was about dance. Tina wouldn't talk at all and had trouble working in groups. Sam woudn't eat unless it applied to his strict diet. Quinn still waited for her parents to love her for all that she was. Finn hated himself for any mistake even if his mother never stopped loving him. Kurt self esteem was in the gutter. Mercedes turned to food for comfort. Puck was a womanizer and pretty vain. All have recovered some will be medicated for the rest of their lives, but they can live long happy productive lives.

I have talked to Santana and Brittany's parents we managed to get them in an apartment across us. They are still the sickest out of the kids, but it was more fear of living alone when they have lived in a very safe place for 5+ years. They just needed to be eased back into the real world. It wouldn't be the same with out them in my class next September. Sure there were new kids, Sugar, Rory, Joe, Lauren, Matt, Becky, Jacob and Sunshine. But I was still loosing half the club that I had taught and grown to love for the last two years.

It was going to be weird seeing them as adults and treating them as adults. Emma and I would have difficulty not checking up on them. I worry that if we do we would intrude on an intimate time, or annoy them enough to move before they are ready. I know by word of mouth that they have been planing a wedding since before Brittany's accident. They planned on getting engaged and adapted to living on their own. After finding a therapist because of all the drugs they have to take to be normal, they are going to move to Iowa to actually get married. It was sweet but still dreams of little school girls. We'll have to wait and see what happens, they both are lucky enough to have supportive family as far as their parents and sibling go. I don't know about their extended families.

Someone had to look after them, I'll be sure to offer to walk them from place to place. It's not like there are a lot of shady people around here but Brittany is too trusting and Santana is nervous about everyone, I don't know how she would react if someone were to 'check out' either of them. It's not like they aren't attractive. Everyone at LIMH just knew better. They were young women now and very pretty young women. Strangers aren't going to know that flirting with either of them is a terrible idea. I'm worried they're going to end up being sent back.

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AN: If you have noticed I have been glacing over a lot of time. Mainly because it would just be the same drill. There is going to be a Brittana epilogue but if you want a full chapter on any of the remaining characters, ask in the review. This will be the last chapter before the epilogue but it's not set in stone.


	30. Brittana Epilogue

=Santana=

I wake up a gain to my wife's retching from our bathroom. It has been five years since I we left the hospital. I get up walking in to help her. I tie her hair back. We moved a year ago our parents followed us mainly because they had a grandbaby on the way, kind of it took a while for the treatments to work but the doctors said it would. Jose moved too because he wanted to spoil his Godchild, he could easily transfer over here, and if the fertility treatments continued to fail. We had read all the books taken a zillion classes anything to improve the chances of her becoming pregnant. Finally we became pregnant and I planned to spoil her and baby Lucas or Lucy rotton.

The rest of the glee club have scattered all over but we keep up in touch by facebook and try to get together at least once a year. Last time I saw most of them was at Mike and Tina's wedding. Mike and Tina we see often because they moved with us. They lived across town though. Iowa felt safe and allowed same-sex-marriage that and the recurring nigh-terrors took place in New York half the time. There were too many people to watch at one time. I liked it here. Still had bad dreams but not half as often as I used to, instead of three times a week it was about once a week and only the intense graphic ones once a month. She sits up wiping her face, "Who thought that making babies would make me this sick."Brittany's voice had all but gone away from being sick off and on all week. I think only half the food has made it all the way though even with her eating more than normal trying to compensate saying that baby needed some food. I still don't think it's enough. The docters said as long as the vitamins don't come back up, baby should be fine.

"But it's worth it right?" I say trying to comfort her.

She nodded happily, "I just would like to keep my food down for a change." She paused and got really serious, "Are you still going to love me when I look like a cow?" By the end of the sentence her voice was cracking. Goodness she was moody this morning.

"You won't look like a cow, you'll be my beautiful pregnant wife. Now what do you want for breakfast?"

"Can I have anything?" she asks with a smirk I knew what she wanted, but I'll let her tell me in case baby had a change of heart.

"Anything."

"Mac&cheese with your Spanish meatballs."

I knew it, she had been eating that for a week now. I would stick to my bagel though. I kiss the side of her head. "You get cleaned up and I'll go start it."

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_It had been a long day at the office. My feet hurt like hell and I have a throbbing headache. I had called Brittany and told her I was going to be a little late. That my dick of a boss had given me more paperwork that was two hours ago. I called her again to tell her I was on my way but had gotten no answer. That wasn't too unusual she usually showered at night. She might have left her phone in the other room. It happened often. _

_I'm jealous that she works less hours than me and gets paid better and she gets to play with pre-schoolers and dance all day. She loved her job. I hated mine. Mainly because of my boss, he grabs my ass, he'd ask me to bend over to pick up a dropped file. He even asked if I'll give him a sex tape of Brittany and me. I hadn't reported him because I needed this job. I needed to support Britt and our future family. My co-workers some were bad some were actually nice. Mark was probably the worst he left notes on my desk, defining what a marriage was. It was a desk job, I have worked my way up and though he didn't sign them I knew they were from him the way he preaches to everyone. He regularly told me that Britt and I were going to hell. Others whispered. . If I wanted to be a real bitch to my co-workers that have the nerve to preach to me, I would say that Isaac's wife was fucking their gardener. That Libby's husband was in the closet, and Tate was just tired of paying for it. _

_I come home and get a sense that something was wrong. There was really something wrong. I take a deep breath this was just my anxiety acting up. I open the door to our rent house to see Brittany shaking her head violently. "Santana! No!" Brittany yells but before I could respond a man I didn't know hits her with the butt of a gun. I notice fresh bruising already forming right above her eye from before. I try to run to her but feel cold metal at the back of my neck. "I wouldn't do that if I were you." _

_I look behind me to see Tate. "If this is about the paperwork for the Wilson case. I'll do it just don't hurt her." _

"_You really think this is just about you, don't you? You see my kid brother has been obsessing over your...err life partner for some time now. I agreed to help as I have always wanted to fuck your brains out. He has been stalking her for a long time. We knew where you live we know who your friends are. We stole her car keys and my brother hid in her back seat until she finished her class. As soon as the fruit and Korean guy was gone he drugged her. You have a choice you can give us a show, what we want and go from there or we can take what we want and we kill you. Try anything and we'll plant your bodies at the studio and bomb it with all the adorable little tykes in there too. Are you hungry doll cause Britt-Britt made us dinner." _

"_Don't hurt her.." But they don't answer. Tate then lowers his gun and walks over to her yanking her up by the wrist. "Show me to the bedroom darling and we'll pick up something sexy for you and Tana to wear. Then we can move you to our place. You watch her, get to know her; don't let her get away, strip her down checking for weapons and phones exedra be sure to check her hair too. I have already called dibs on her so you better not start the party without me or I'll just fuck blondie instead." he says back to his brother. "And make sure she eats, she's going to need the energy for the fun night that we have planned." _

_Brittany looks back to me begging me to do something, but I couldn't. They both had guns. Even with the basic self-defence classes I had us take I couldn't fight them both, if I hoped to get us both out of this alive. "So how do you know my wife." I say studying every feature of him. He was certainly Tate's brother. The same chin the same hazel eyes, the same mousy hair. _

"_My daughter is in her dance class. I asked her out and she told me she was married. I looked into it trying to see if she was lying. I was thrilled to find out she was fucking a woman, and a woman who worked with my brother. We have been planning this for over a year. Researching you learning everything about you. We know that you both have been in the mental hospital. I read about how your uncle used to rape you. How the trauma of it all turn you into a true whore before you even were old enough to drive. We're going to see if we can bring that back out of you. It should be easy, I bet you haven't been fucked by a real cock since your freshman year of high school." He wraps his arms around me making me feel sick. "Now eat baby you're going to need your strength for the fuckfest we have planned." He scooped up a fork wrapped with pasta waiting for me to take it. I take the fork defeated and hating myself for being such a coward. I start crying over the cold pasta, wanting it all to end before it even began._

I feel light kisses on the back of my neck, "San wake up you having a bad dream." more playful kisses on the back of my neck I feel a bump on my back. I smile and roll us over.

"Thank you darling. How my little man." I coo to her stomach. She was barely showing but a small bump was starting to show four months into it. Our baby boy was clearly on his way.

"Better now that his Mami is awake and feeling better. San what was it about this time."

"Just the same old thing. You'll tell me if some creep was hitting on you wouldn't you?"

"Of course."

"So there's no weirdo sending you flowers, hanging around after class offering to walk you to your car. Not counting Sasha or Mike." Sasha was the head dance coach and probably the only guy I met that was more flaming than Kurt, but he could fight and promised me he would look after her. Along with Mike I was confident that they'd protect her but the anxiety is there.

"No the creepiest thing that has ever happened there was parents requesting me as a private coach, verses Sasha who's more qualified, hoping my hotness would turn him straight."

"I see where they could be coming from. If I were a gay male you'll turn me straight. So is the poor boy really gay."

"Think Kurt in a leotard obsessed with ballet and dance instead of Broadway. I don't want to label him off just yet he's only seven but he thinks regular boys are 'ewwy' because they don't keep their nails clean"

"Yep that's pretty gay." I say getting up to write in the dream journal the shrink wants me to keep. She said it'll help, I have my doubts but between the journal and my medication, I was probably as normal as I ever will be.

"So what about you are there creepers I need to worry about. Is that guy still harassing you?" She asked.

I thought for a minute on how to word it. The head boss was OK but my supervisor was not. He was just a normal creep I'll catch him trying to look down my shirt. He made sexist comments but not on the level that apparently was in the dream. I never understood how I could know random things that were different in the dream. "Not really the good guys out number the one pig. He's only made sexist comments and tried to look down my shirt. Grabbed my ass once. If it elevates I'll report him." She gives me a worid

"Try to get some more sleep." she says already dosing off. I snuggle in behind her putting a protective hand on our baby.

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"Britt come out of there." She locked herself in the bathroom before I woke up. From what I guessed from the mess she couldn't find a pair of pants that she could button. I knew the day was coming she had only been wearing gym pants for the last week.

"No! I don't want you to see me, I'm huge. You'll see me and be so grossed out then you'll leave me." she yelled from the bathroom.

"Your having another human growing in your belly, you knew you were going to have to buy new pants eventually." I took out an old gift card and sled it though the lock. The door opened but she barely moved from the bathtub. I was exhausted from working a 14 hour day the day before.

It was harder than I thought trying to balance work and taking care of her with her severe mood swings. She's sitting in a pair of pajama pants that the pulled the drawstring out of. "I'm not going to leave you you're carrying my baby and I love you. Come on you're going to have to wear something other than pjs after a while. And you and I both know you'll have your awesome dancer's body back with in months of his delivery."

I smile offering a hand to her. She takes it and gives a smile not the 100 watt but far from a weak one. "Will you come to the maternity store with me." I nod knowing she'll be confused at the maternity sizes. And would likely be emotional when she sees the sizes.

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Today was special. It was a Saturday and I was going to take Brittany out on a picnic/zoo/movie/dinner date. It was going to be an all day thing while Mike, Tina, Sasha, Jose and our parents. Paint our duck themed nursery. I gave them basic instructions for it: yellow walls with a white and blue boarder with little yellow ducks. Between the eight of them and me we had a rough idea of what it'll look like now I just had to keep Brittany busy without letting her know what was going on. We agreed on turning the small bedroom into the nursery but keeping it unisex and make it a little boys room through things that can be changed out for when and if we planned for another. The study would become his bedroom later if we had a girl if not we'll take down the boarder and even paint it if he insists but it was simple but Brittany would love it. We had a bassinet for our bed room. Baby monitors, those overprotective locks and outlet plugs, parenting magazines with articles ranging form diet for the baby, to potty training, to talking about the 'Birds and the Bees' Brittany kept all of them neatly filed into two filing boxes: one for preschool on and one for age 0-4. From there they were filed by age, and subject. People say she's dumb but just the organisation of them baffled me. Lucas Erwin Lopez-Pierce was going to have everything he needs and more. He was ours and I planed on spoiling him rotten.

It was hard to believe that he'd be here in about four weeks if all went as plan. The doctors said that there was no obvious problems that he was indeed a boy. I am a little worried about her schizophrenia but Brittany turned out fine even if she still talks to herself and argues confusing those around her, but she was still pretty normal even with being off her meds for the last eight months. "Santana what's going on?"

"Ah...nothing can't I take you out for a day." I say knowing she was on to me but I still wanted it to be a surprise. She smiles and take my hand. The picnic went well a Frisbee landed in the salad but Brittany enjoyed petting the puppy that followed and his owner apologised. The zoo would have been next if I didn't hear the splashing of water to the ground and a groan.

"San I didn't even think I had to go." I smile at her confuistion

"Don't worry about it babe just get in the car, I'm going to take you to the hospital."

"Why, what's wrong...am I having the baby?" I nod spinning out of the parking lot. "But it isn't time yet!" she ended with a small groan.

"He's ready now." I say getting on the highway very much speeding not obsessive speeding she was only having minor contractions but he was still a month early. I called the hospital and my mom then I focused on the five miles remaining our hospital. My anxiety was mounting but I couldn't let it show Britt was already worried enough from the premature labor. I pull in to the drive of the ER and snag an empty wheel chair.

After they take her room, I left to go park. With in ten minutes we settled in the delivery room. My mom showed up with the car seat and the hospital bag we packed just days before. "Are they OK." I nod but the anxiousness of it all made me start crying. "Baby..." she pulls me into a hug. "It's going to be OK. They're going to be OK." More family members showed up taking shifts in working on the nursery. Eight hours later Lucas was born at 8:15pm weighing in at 5.6 pounds.

"I don't understand I did everything right." Britt says looking holding his hand so gentlly afraid that he would break.

"You did do everything right. He just wanted to surprise you by coming early. He's going to be fine the IV is just to give him the extra nourishment he would have gotten if he waited. The bed with the lights are to keep him warm until he gains a little weight." I explain. "Other than being early he's perfect." I say looking down at his dark hair, I couldn't tell if it was dark brown or black like mine. His skin was the shade Brittany's was when she got a tan. He was indeed perfect. Life couldn't get any better looking at our little mircle I forgot about LIMH and everything that sent us there. I forgot about my childhood, I only wanted to focus on the future with my perfect family.

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**AN: Sorry this update took so long. Writers block kicked my butt. I hope this ending is good enough. Like I said if you want an epilogue of any other character or ship I'll try to write one all you have to do is ask. Thanks for reading. PLEASE REVIEW.**


	31. Sanity after Insanity

_This isn't really an update but a promotion for a sequel which will be a series of drabbles and one shots. Mostly Brittana but might include Faberry/Wemma/Tike. As of right now it's going to be drastically lighter than it's predecessor but still might have some heavy chapters...I titled it Sanity after Insanity and it can be found on my ya'll for reading this far. _


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